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djmephdjmeph Detroit Icrontian
edited Dec 2011 in The Pub
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Comments

  • djmephdjmeph Detroit Icrontian
    edited Sep 2011
    lhLsQ.png
    erichblas2005
  • ThraxThrax Professional Shill, Pokémaster, Watch Slut, Mumble Hivemind Drone Austin, TX Icrontian
    edited Sep 2011
    The earth...
  • djmephdjmeph Detroit Icrontian
    edited Sep 2011
    Thrax wrote:
    The earth...
    tH6IR.jpg
  • UPSLynxUPSLynx Top EA shill, The Dean of Computer Graphics Redwood City, CA Icrontian
    edited Sep 2011
    Holy crap, Earth? Really?

    Oh internet, you so crazy.
  • CantiCanti =/= smalltime http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y9K18CGEeiI&feature=related Icrontian
    edited Sep 2011
    Earth is way bigger than the sun. Proof - you can see the whole sun, you can not see the whole Earth.
  • djmephdjmeph Detroit Icrontian
    edited Sep 2011
    Judging by her answer to the second question, I'm pretty sure she thinks the Sun revolves around the Earth.
  • UPSLynxUPSLynx Top EA shill, The Dean of Computer Graphics Redwood City, CA Icrontian
    edited Sep 2011
    wait, I just noticed - this site gives you an enemy percentage?
  • djmephdjmeph Detroit Icrontian
    edited Sep 2011
    Yeah, you can answer a question, you can say what answers you would accept from the other person, and how important it is to you. For instance, it is very important to me that the girl I'm dating understand the Sun is bigger than the Earth, so that particular answer increased her enemy percentage.

    This is why OKCupid is so awesome. There are many tools you can use to filter out people you know you'd be incompatible with from the very beginning.
  • SnarkasmSnarkasm Madison, WI Icrontian
    edited Sep 2011
    They have some great questions, too. Belief in dinosaurs, evolution, religion, etc are all tested. There are even math problems.
  • djmephdjmeph Detroit Icrontian
    edited Sep 2011
    it should also be pointed out that okcupid used to be the spark.
  • PirateNinjaPirateNinja I don't know how to not Icrontian
    edited Sep 2011
    I'd suggest real life dating and finding all this information out the classic hard way. You may find the love of your life has a completely different view on religion than you. You don't want to find yourself dating dj meph with tits and no beard.
    Anyways, earf is pretty big.
    FettBacon
  • primesuspectprimesuspect Beepin n' Boopin Detroit, MI Icrontian
    edited Sep 2011
    I'd suggest real life dating and finding all this information out the classic hard way.

    I'm gonna chime in here for a minute.

    I heard this a lot when I was single for so long. I'd like to make a point.

    Guys like me and DJ Meph are extremely social. I mean, I was out there a lot, hanging out, going to events, being outgoing, social, meeting strangers, talking to everyone. My single years were the years I got into Twitter and the thriving Detroit social media scene. Believe me, I was out there. Somehow, with all this magical outgoing behavior in the thriving Detroit social scene, I remained single for years and years.

    Norm is even more social than me. This guy DJs at gigs, travels, plans parties, he is hot on the scene.

    There's something you're missing, and it's a vital part of the "big guys" dating scene, and it's something not a lot of people talk about: Most women are just as shallow as men. They make snap judgments about a person based on his weight, his look, whatever.

    My point is: It's MUCH, much harder for a fat guy to find a date "in the real world" than it is for a guy who is physically attractive right off the bat, no matter what our other redeeming qualities are.

    While I didn't meet Nicole on OkCupid, she DID scope me out online before agreeing to meet with me; she liked my OkCupid profile, my pictures showed that I was silly and fun, etc.

    If Norm wants my advice, which he may not because he didn't ask, it would be to continue using OKCupid, because it rocks.
    sharkydartlmorchard
  • ThraxThrax Professional Shill, Pokémaster, Watch Slut, Mumble Hivemind Drone Austin, TX Icrontian
    edited Sep 2011
    I'd suggest real life dating and finding all this information out the classic hard way.

    :rolleyes: Times change. Dating changes. Telling people to do "real life dating" is patronizing and ignorant.
    sharkydart
  • djmephdjmeph Detroit Icrontian
    edited Sep 2011
    i am not that narrow-minded that i wouldn't date someone with different beliefs than me. however, i feel it's important to know where they stand. if there is a hell, i am surely going there after i die. a religious woman who believes in hell is going to eventually resent our religious differences somewhere down the road, when she starts to think about the afterlife and how we will be separated by death. i've seen it happen before to many married couples and it always ends in mysery. i don't think i'm missing out on anything by trying to prevent that from happening.
  • PirateNinjaPirateNinja I don't know how to not Icrontian
    edited Sep 2011
    ouch my bad ... something was lost in translation and I'm sorry, I didn't mean to sound like a dick. I did online dating in the past too .. my comment wasn't about that. I wrote it poorly.
    What I meant was to give people a chance even if they don't share the same meta data, and online databases like this make it really easy to quickly discard people.
    QuadyTheTurnip
  • QCHQCH Ancient Guru Chicago Area - USA Icrontian
    edited Sep 2011
    I know of 3 MARRIED couples that found love through dating sites. I do not want a carbon copy of me. Noell is NOT anywhere close to a carbon copy of me. However, even after knowing her for 3 years before marriage, there are things I am still finding out that are kind of big deals. We roll with them because of our history and willingness to adapt. However, it is something we have to deal with and are a sore spot. There are many things that would make our relationship better if those would have been discovered and worked out beforehand.

    For instance... I am spiritual but NOT in anyway comfortable with "Structured Religion Inc." and it has caused fights. I am VERY liberal in many ways but also VERY conservative in a few ways. She is middle of the road...

    So... as long as using those online sites do not require you to marry anyone they state is compatible, it's just an ice breaker. You act like an ass on your first date, you might very well make that 90% compatible become 20%.
  • JokkeJokke Bergen, Norway Icrontian
    edited Sep 2011
    Two words in one: Craigslist.
  • MAGICMAGIC Doot Doot Furniture City, Michigan Icrontian
    edited Sep 2011
    Blind luck.
  • TushonTushon I'm scared, Coach Alexandria, VA Icrontian
    edited Sep 2011
    As a partially related aside: thoughts on messages from girls/guys you consider unattractive/do not like what you see on profile or answers, etc. Should you return something or nothing?
  • AnnesAnnes Tripped Up by Libidos and Hubris Alexandria, VA Icrontian
    edited Sep 2011
    Something. But not a bitchy something like that jerkboat above. A tactful response.

    Also, I think differing religions is a no-go if you ever want to have children. The arguments about whether or not to raise them religious could easily rip a relationship apart.
  • TushonTushon I'm scared, Coach Alexandria, VA Icrontian
    edited Sep 2011
    Thanks Annes.
  • PirateNinjaPirateNinja I don't know how to not Icrontian
    edited Sep 2011
    Tushon wrote:
    As a partially related aside: thoughts on messages from girls/guys you consider unattractive/do not like what you see on profile or answers, etc. Should you return something or nothing?

    This is exactly what I was trying to say shouldn't happen (just in my opinion). I think you should give people a chance and take them out to really find out what they are about. To just say well they are in to X and I'm in to Y, it will never work is a bit silly .. again in my opinion. I don't know much about anything, but I do think the if it will work out or not takes more than just looking over a profile and giving the thumbs up or down. I think people need to agree to meet up or have some conversation before they make that decision, otherwise they could easily miss out. Everything depends, and there are no simple answers when it comes to differences. That's all I got.
  • BobbyDigiBobbyDigi ? R U #Hats ! SoCal Icrontian
    edited Sep 2011
    Thread

    TLDR; Never Judge a Book By It's Cover, Even the Jacket Notes. Read The First Chapter.
  • TushonTushon I'm scared, Coach Alexandria, VA Icrontian
    edited Sep 2011
    This is exactly what I was trying to say shouldn't happen (just in my opinion). I think you should give people a chance and take them out to really find out what they are about. To just say well they are in to X and I'm in to Y, it will never work is a bit silly .. again in my opinion. I don't know much about anything, but I do think the if it will work out or not takes more than just looking over a profile and giving the thumbs up or down. I think people need to agree to meet up or have some conversation before they make that decision, otherwise they could easily miss out. Everything depends, and there are no simple answers when it comes to differences. That's all I got.

    I definitely get that, and I'm not necessarily getting at "we disagree about this on the question that someone wrote and worded a certain way" and more of a "I'm in no way attracted to this person but they messaged me, so what is nicer: nothing or a nice reply stating not interested".
  • djmephdjmeph Detroit Icrontian
    edited Sep 2011
    I am also not of the belief that there is one perfect person out there for me. In fact, I'm pretty sure there are many semi-perfect people out there who have their own thing going on, and eventually I'll commit to one if we can figure out how to make our independent lives work together.
  • TushonTushon I'm scared, Coach Alexandria, VA Icrontian
    edited Sep 2011
    Totally agreed.
  • WagsFTWWagsFTW Grand Rapids, MI Icrontian
    edited Sep 2011
    Have to chime in, because a few weeks ago I actually met someone amazing off OkCupid. This Summer, I decided to go ahead and give OkCupid a shot. When you aren't in school anymore, and work with a bunch of 40 and 50-year olds, and don't want to meet someone in a bar, it can be difficult to meet someone. I just wanted to try it and see what was out there.

    Online dating, and the questions OkCupid asks focuses on several different areas, and rates your compatibility accordingly. Honestly, I wouldn't talk to anyone with less than 80% compatibility. Yes, it may take away from some of the getting to know someone the "natural" and "in person" way, but it ensures that this person is answering these questions, without knowing what your answers are, and they aren't saying just what you want to hear. Or not saying anything at all. Meeting someone the "old-fashioned" way, you may end up being with someone for 1, 2, 3, or more years, and may not truly know their stance on politics, religion, finances, etc. because they may hold it in, they may compromise for you (with or without you asking them to), or they may just not tell you a lot of things. And yes, when you have kids, differences in religion and family are a huge deal. They are also with marriage. Ensuring you are compatible on these levels provides opportunity to only really have to deal with the personality compatibility when you meet someone in person, rather than the opposite process with in person dating.

    Online dating may streamline things, and some people may think it is less fun, but it can also prevent future headaches.

    I met someone I am 89% compatible with, and when we met in person, our personalities clicked, and we conveniently have a similar and compatible sense of humor. It makes the beginning of this relationship that much easier, because we knew the basic stances we had on particular things, and could ask and discuss them in more detail in person, providing a stronger comfort-level in discussing these things, and having things to talk about.

    I'd recommend OkCupid to anyone. It doesn't hurt.
  • GargoyleGargoyle Purveyor of Lincoln Nightmares Illinois Icrontian
    edited Sep 2011
    Had a bunch of good dates on OkCupid, met some friends, but nothing went anywhere relationship-wise. Met someone randomly, hit it off. Me and statistics have never seen eye to eye, anyway.

    Try online dating, because if you're moping about being lonely and haven't tried online dating, you're not trying hard enough. Just don't expect any one particular method to necessarily work, just because it worked for someone else. Even OkCupid is subject to chance. Think of 89% compatible as meaning "you're 89% likely to be compatible with this person" (based on a handful of questions that are nowhere near a scientific survey) instead of "you guys agree about 89% of all the things." Compatible is binary, not something you can be "kinda" about. So, how many 89%ers are you really compatible with? Just try, and find out.
  • MAGICMAGIC Doot Doot Furniture City, Michigan Icrontian
    edited Sep 2011
    Gargoyle wrote:
    Had a bunch of good dates on OkCupid, met some friends, but nothing went anywhere relationship-wise. Met someone randomly, hit it off. Me and statistics have never seen eye to eye, anyway.

    Try online dating, because if you're moping about being lonely and haven't tried online dating, you're not trying hard enough. Just don't expect any one particular method to necessarily work, just because it worked for someone else. Even OkCupid is subject to chance. Think of 89% compatible as meaning "you're 89% likely to be compatible with this person" (based on a handful of questions that are nowhere near a scientific survey) instead of "you guys agree about 89% of all the things." Compatible is binary, not something you can be "kinda" about. So, how many 89%ers are you really compatible with? Just try, and find out.

    Does my 1 fit in your 0? Yes? We are compatible.
  • djmephdjmeph Detroit Icrontian
    edited Sep 2011
    MAGIC wrote:
    Does my 1 fit in your 0? Yes? We are compatible.

    LOL, yeah compatibility is definitely not binary, and anyone who thinks so is setting themselves up for failure in their relationships. People like to think that when they are falling in love they are going to be with the same person for the rest of their life, and that's a great goal to have. However, both people are going to change during the relationship and it's important to understand that when going in. Compatibility is not only a dark, grey area, it's temporary, and the future of a relationship has more to do with the ability to adapt and empathize than it does with compatibility.

    I think people try to idealize relationships too much, and that is what causes a lot of problems between couples. As people grow older and their views and their goals change, one person might not think that the relationship has reached that idealist vision they had when they first started dating, or when they first got married, and it causes resentment.

    I've had the privilege of mostly being single and watching my friends relationships fail over and over again for more than a decade. It has certainly given me a new perspective and outlook on relationships.
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