The Atheist

[Tex]

An Atheist was taking a walk through the woods.
What majestic trees! What powerful rivers!
What beautiful animals!" he said to himself.
As he was walking alongside the river, he heard a
rustling in the bushes behind him. He turned to look.
He saw a 7 foot grizzly bear charge towards him. He ran as
fast as he could up the path. He looked over his
shoulder and saw that the bear was closing in on him.
He looked over his shoulder again, and the bear was
even closer. He tripped and fell on the ground. He
rolled over to pick himself up but saw the bear right
on top of him, reaching for him with his left paw and
raising his right paw to strike him. At that instant
the Atheist cried out: "Oh my God!..."

Time stopped. The bear froze. The forest was silent.
As a bright light shone upon the man, a voice came out
of the sky:

"You deny my existence for all of these years, teach
others I don't exist, and even credit creation to a
cosmic accident. Do you expect me to help you out of
this predicament? Am I to count you as a believer?"

The atheist looked directly into the light, "It would
be hypocritical of me to suddenly ask You to treat me
as a Christian now, but perhaps could you make the
BEAR a Christian?"

"Very well," said the voice.

The light went out. The sounds of the forest resumed.
And then the bear dropped his right paw, brought both
paws together and bowed his head and spoke:
"Lord, bless this food, which I am about to receive
from thy bounty through Christ our Lord. Amen.

[GnomeWizardd]

Best Joke Ever!!!!!!!!!!

[Thrax]

heh

[Templar]

From an atheist standpoint: lol :D

[Dexter]

It would be funny, except that, in my experience as an Atheist, most people base their disbelief in any god on the basic lack of proof. They follow a chain of logic that says that it is illogical to believe in something that has no defiinitive proof. The fellow in this story was presented with an overwhelming proof. It would not be hyporcritical of him to suddenly believe in a god if he had sudden, overwhelming, logical proof of the god's existence. Therefore, he would more likely do the logical thing, accept the defiinitive proof of time stopping and bright lights and a voice from above that knows his belief system as being proof of a god, and then believe in it.

Most Atheists ask only a simple question of Theists: Prove it. This experience would prove it to this fellow.

Any one interested in debate on this topic is welcome to join http://www.keyboardjockey.com/

Dexter...

[profdlp]

Is the bear Catholic?

Does the Pope...

[csimon]

Is the bear Catholic?

Does the Pope...Does a bear pope in the woods? LOL (no offense)

[pseudonym]

Muahahahhaa, that was a good one.

[GnomeWizardd]

Dang Dex why cant you even see the humor in a simple joke without having to analyze it!?!?!?!

[Thrax]

Because analyzation is fun.

[Dexter]

Oh don't get me wrong Gnome: I can see where it would be funny to people who do not fully understand the concept of Atheism.

Dexter...

[Tex]

Maybe Thrax but... "analyzation" of a joke is just anal.

Dex.. no one cares... no one gives a flying f*ck what you believe or don't believe. No one is trying to convert you.

It's a joke for pete's sake. You guys really got to get a life you know.

Tex

[Thrax]

Honestly Tex, you read what he had to say, so atleast you gave some care to it. ;D ;)

Relax guys.

[GnomeWizardd]

I think this is truly sickening. It was just a joke and then Dex has to come in here and ANALIZE a joke! its like what the heck? Its a joke!

Why can't you have a sense of humor ? Is it just not built into being an Athiest? Man That must suck having to be an Athiest with no sense of Humor! What exactly do you have to live for if you must be so serious all the time?

People crack Christian jokes all the time and I will admit they are funny as anything.

BTW Thrax is right analizing things is fun but not a joke!

[Dexter]

Repeat broadcast just for Gnome:


Oh don't get me wrong Gnome: I can see where it would be funny to people who do not fully understand the concept of Atheism.


If I can see that the joke would be funny, then I must have a sense of humour. :rolleyes2

Dexter...

[GnomeWizardd]

Hey pal Reread what you typed

" It would be funny, except that "

see that EXCEPT that?? that means you didnt think it was funny

[Dexter]

Gnome, I have no desire to get into a fight with you about whether or not I have a sense of humour. Me thinking that a joke is not funny does not mean I cannot see where it would be funny to others. It does not mean I do not have a sense of humour.

*I* didn't find it funny because I understand the concept of Atheism from the insider's viewpoint. I also stated that I can see that the joke has an element of humour that would be more appreciated by those who do not have the vantage of that viewpoint.

That is all I have to say on the subject. If you wish to analyze my sense of humour futher, please feel free to click on my name, and send me Private Message. :shakehead

Dexter...

[GnomeWizardd]

From an atheist standpoint: lol :D


:rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes:


I rather not send you a PM cause i don't feel like reading a book written by you sent via PM

[Kwitko]

Well, that's enough arguing for one joke. If you guys feel the need to debate the existence of God, feel free, just not here.

[Lincoln]

As an Atheist, Dexter felt it was an inaccurate portrayal. Many would have done the same if the joke had been based on a comparable assumption about Christianity. In anycase, it is hardly worth getting this worked up over a joke. Subject adjourned :)

//edit: Seems Mr. Kwitko and I had the same idea at the same time :p