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Tex
22 Feb 2006, 11:50pm
It's that time of year to take our annual senior citizen test.

Exercise of the brain is as important as exercise of the muscles. As we grow older, it's important to keep mentally alert. If you don't use it, you lose it! Below is a very private way to gauge your loss or non-loss of intelligence.
Take the test presented here to determine if you're losing it or not. The spaces below are so you don't see the answers until you've made your answer.
OK, relax, clear your mind and begin.


1. What do you put in a toaster?




























Answer: "bread." If you said "toast," give up now and do something else. Try not to hurt yourself. If you said, bread, go to Question 2.


2. Say "silk" five times. Now spell "silk." What do cows drink?




























Answer: Cows drink water. If you said "milk," don't
attempt the next question. Your brain is over-stressed and may even overheat. Content yourself with reading a more appropriate literature such as Auto World. However, if you said "water", proceed to question 3.


3. If a red house is made from red bricks and a blue house is made from blue bricks and a pink house is made from pink bricks and a black house is made from black bricks, what is a green house made from?





















Answer: Greenhouses are made from glass. If you said "green bricks," why the hell are you still reading these???
If you said "glass," go on to Question 4.


4. It's twenty years ago, and a plane is flying at 20,000 feet over Germany (If you will recall, Germany at the time was politically divided into West Germany and East Germany) Anyway, during the flight, TWO engines fail. The pilot, realizing that the last remaining engine is also failing, decides on a crash landing procedure. Unfortunately the engine fails before he can do so and the plane fatally crashes smack in the middle of "no man's land" between East Germany and West Germany. Where would you bury the survivors? East Germany, West Germany, or no man's land"?


























Answer: You don't bury survivors.
If you said ANYTHING else, you're a dunce and you must stop. If you said, "You don't bury survivors", proceed to the next question.

5. Without using a calculator - You are driving a bus from London to Milford Haven in Wales. In London, 17 people get on the bus; In Reading, six people get off the bus and nine people get on. In Swindon, two people get off and four get on. In Cardiff , 11 people get off and 16 people get on. In Swansea, three people get off and five people get on In Carmathen, six people get off and three get on. You then arrive at Milford Haven. What was the name of the bus driver?

















Answer: Oh, for crying out loud!
Don't you remember your own name? It was YOU!!


PS: 95% of people fail most of the questions!!

---------------------

LMAO

Lets see how many tell the truth on their phucking score here.

Tex

Nightwolf
22 Feb 2006, 11:53pm
All oldies but great one.

Gargoyle
23 Feb 2006, 12:09am
I only got the one about the greenhouse. On some others, I didn't get the expected answer, but I didn't get the right one either (despite having seen these before :shakehead)

muddocktor
23 Feb 2006, 1:09am
I got all except the last one, Tex. ;D;D I guess my brain was too fried from keeping track of how many were left on the bus. ;D;D

Missileman
23 Feb 2006, 2:15am
I only missed the "What do cows drink?"

What's scary is I grew up on a dairy farm milking 70 head of cows twice a day. I know what they drink, eat, and other things.

Age gets us in some amazing ways :bigggrin:

bikerboy
23 Feb 2006, 2:22am
i got 3 outta 5. but i must admit i had heard a few before. very nice tho tex

bikerboy

entropy
23 Feb 2006, 3:30am
For the record, the "green( )house" question is flawed. If it had been typed, "greenhouse" I would've caught it, but a greenhouse is not a green house.

You lose. By you I mean the test. And by lose I mean sucks. :p

dragonV8
23 Feb 2006, 4:29am
Very interesting questions. Since i realised they were trick questions, i took my time reading them. Got 5 out of 5. Nearly caught me with the last one though.:smiles:

Seen the cow one before. Told them "milk" that time.