It's the Twisted Genie Game.

[kryyst]

The concept is simple. You make a wish and then the next person plays the Genie and grants your wish. But in such a fashion as to make it a broken outcome from your original wish. They then post their own wish.

So for example if I said I wish I had a million dollars

Then the next person could say *poof* receive a million dollars - all at once and all landing on top of you, killing you in an instance. The more creative the twist the better.

So with that in mind.

I wish for world peace.

[Zuntar]

*POOF*
You receive world peace, but only for an instant,and then all hell broke loose!

I wish I could understand women!:cool:

[kryyst]

I wish I could understand women!:cool:

*poof* You suddenly understand women - but your understanding means you are now attracted to men.

I wish I could fly.

[Zuntar]

*poof* You suddenly understand women - but your understanding means you are now attracted to men.

I wish I could fly.

Damn didn't see that one.

*Poof* you can now fly - but you can't land except in piles of dung.:eek:

[kryyst]

*Poof* you can now fly - but you can't land except in piles of dung.:eek:

Good one

[yagga]

I wish I was Zuntar's stable admin twin.

[LiLbRo]

I wish I was Zuntar's stable admin twin.
*POOF*
You're his admin twin, but unfortunate for you, there is no one here to admin...


wait... :sadpanda:


I wish I were an eagle. :)

[Your Amish Daddy]

Zubaan! You are now an Eagle. A Bronze Eagle in an antiques shop.

I wish for a box of malted milk balls.

[yagga]

Zubaan! You are now an Eagle. A Bronze Eagle in an antiques shop.

I wish for a box of malted milk balls.

whoalla! you have malted milk balls, however you drop them while walking up your steps by your door and you fall and the ambulance comes. The spoiled neighbor kid also happens to be outside and eats them all...

I wish my bus had a functioning radio to annoy the kids with.

[LiLbRo]

Poof!

Your bus now has a functioning radio, and it does annoy the kids, unfortunately one of the disgruntled children kills you in an ADD driven fit of rage

I wish I was not hung over

[Your Amish Daddy]

Kalashnikov! You're not hung over anymore, but you're suffering from fits of sneezes and a temporary bout with Tourettes during church and or school and have been subsequently expelled.

I wished that the carbon-metabolizing physical presence that currently houses my conscious and those physical manefestations of my comrades all possess as our common residential abode the interior of a mid-visible spectrum double hulled buoyancy controlled ship of war!

[kryyst]

I wished that the carbon-metabolizing physical presence that currently houses my conscious and those physical manefestations of my comrades all possess as our common residential abode the interior of a mid-visible spectrum double hulled buoyancy controlled ship of war!

Ala-kazam I'm sorry but I'm a genie from like 100bc and I don't understand a damn word you just said. Instead I'll give you this ummmm, soda.

I wish I had x-ray vision.

[LiLbRo]

Ala-kazam I'm sorry but I'm a genie from like 100bc and I don't understand a damn word you just said. Instead I'll give you this ummmm, soda.

I wish I had x-ray vision.
*POOF* (im old fashion ;) )
You now have x-ray vision, unfortunately you can only see through the clothes of old men

I wish I had clean clothes :(

[karatekid]

*POOF* (im old fashion ;) )
You now have x-ray vision, unfortunately you can only see through the clothes of old men

I wish I had clean clothes :(

*POOF*
Your clothes are clean, but they all shrank to the size of toddler clothing. Also, you gained 200 pounds.

I wish it wasn't so effin cold out.

[Zuntar]

*CRACK* You are no longer cold because you are in the amazon being chased by wild animals.:eek:



I know I'm gonna regret this......

I wish I was a photographer for the SI swimsuit edition (http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/features/2007_swimsuit/):slob:

[karatekid]

*BAZING* You are a photographer for the SI swimsuit edition. Unfortunately, you didn't read the fine print on the contract you signed, which states that for every picture you take of a model, William Shatner gets to kick you in the groin. You proceed to take thousands of pictures. Good luck!

Humm, this one should be good...

I wish my job was more exciting.

[Your Amish Daddy]

Karatekid! Your job is now more exciting! You are now employed to drive a nitro glycerin truck in New York Traffic. Happy last-few minutes of your life.

I wish that I was a werewolf in london.

[LiLbRo]

Karatekid! Your job is now more exciting! You are now employed to drive a nitro glycerin truck in New York Traffic. Happy last-few minutes of your life.

I wish that I was a werewolf in london.

Poof, but you can't seem to find Lee Ho Fook's for the life of you! (song reference :) )


I wish I were in Georgia right now

[karatekid]

Poof, but you can't seem to find Lee Ho Fook's for the life of you! (song reference :) )


I wish I were in Georgia right now

*WOOSH* You are in Georgia. You can't understand what anybody is saying, or any of the signs, and you have no idea where you are or how to contact anybody.

Welcome to the country of Georgia :naughty:



I wish I had a Wii.

[Your Amish Daddy]

NiiiiiiiiiWHOOOOOOM!!! You have a Wii. A bottle of urine, and a six year old giggling beside you with his pants down, peeing in your shoe. "Yaa! Wii time!"


I wished that I had a decent screwdriver.

[LiLbRo]

NiiiiiiiiiWHOOOOOOM!!! You have a Wii. A bottle of urine, and a six year old giggling beside you with his pants down, peeing in your shoe. "Yaa! Wii time!"


I wished that I had a decent screwdriver.

You now have a decent screw driver, but you got a philips when every screw in the world is now a flat blade

I wish I was good at bowling

[kryyst]

I wish I was good at bowling

*Poof* Your now good at bowling. I didn't think I needed to make it worse then that.

I wish for every dollar I pulled out of my wallet it was replaced by another one.

[karatekid]

*Poof* Your now good at bowling. I didn't think I needed to make it worse then that.

I wish for every dollar I pulled out of my wallet it was replaced by another one.

*DUNK* Now for every dollar you pull out of your wallet, a new one appears in its place. In other news, a new law has been instated that places a 150% tax on all money that appears out of thin air. The money from this tax will fund a NASA mission to study the effects of weightlessness on different denominations of money.

I wish I had some good food in my kitchen.:banana:

[Your Amish Daddy]

Mecalecahimecahineyho! You now have an assortment of delicacies in your fridge and pantry. Indian delicacies that include infant snakes, monkey brains and steamed scarabs.

I wished I had a portable quantum singularity generator.

[karatekid]

*BA-DA-BING* Here is your portable quantum singularity generator. Just becareful with that thi......<You use it>........ Great, you just caused the universe to collapse on itself and existance to end. Thanks, thanks alot. :grumble:


I wish I could find out why my web hosting service locked my account.

[Your Amish Daddy]

Greenbacks! Your webhosting account was locked because you posted illegal content on their service and you've broken their TOS.

I wished I had a phase-change intercooler for my house.

[LiLbRo]

Oink! (I am lame haha)
You now have a phase change inter cooler for your house, but, silly you, you get your junk frozen and they have to amputate :(

I wish my feet were intact and were the perfect temperature

[Your Amish Daddy]

Loopin! Your feet are now perfectly in tact and are quite comfortable, however they're intact in a jar in a mad scientists laboratory, as with the rest of your body.

I wished I had A fresh bag of pretzels.

[Zuntar]

*Bam* you now have a bag of pretzels that as you looked at the bottom of the almost empty bag you found mouse droppings instead of salt .

I wish I could be invisible.

[kryyst]

I wish I could be invisible.

*Shazam!* Much to your surprise you suddenly become invisible. However it only works when no one is looking at you.


I wish I had an Egg McMuffin in front of me right now.

[karatekid]

*CRACKLE* Here you go, there is an Egg McMuffin sitting about 50 feet in front of you. Go on, go get it, just be careful of the heat activated security system that will shot high energy lasers at you and release the hounds if you get within 100 feet of the Egg McMuffin. ...... Opps

I wish it was May.

[Your Amish Daddy]

Shozbot! It's now May first. May First, 1631. Good going.

I wished I were an amiable creature.

[LiLbRo]

Poof! You're now a cute bunny! but then a hawk eats you


I wish I was in a rock band during the 60's

[Zuntar]

*BAM* You're now in a rock band during the 60's. Of course you are on large quantities of drugs and choke to death on your own bloody vomit.

I wish I could give everyone ACTIVE on this forum $10,000.

[kryyst]

I wish I could give everyone ACTIVE on this forum $10,000.

*QUAZAAAM* You can and to do it you put up leans on all your possessions and your parents possessions, which all eventually default forcing you and your family to live in the streets. But you know you have the satisfaction of making the rest of us feel cheery for a little while before we squander it on hookers and drugs and can't even remember where the money came from in the first place.

I wish that I had gotten an extra-extra large coffee this morning instead of just a large.

[karatekid]

*NANANANANANANA*You went and splurged on that extra-extra large coffee, the 128oz big gulp coffee. Once you are finished drinking it all, you will spend the rest of the day running laps around the city and climbing up the sides of buildings, while your boss wonders where you are and decides to fire you.

I wish my bumper was fixed for free.

[Your Amish Daddy]

I'm too lazy for special effects, but your bumper got fixed for free, but in the process of fixing it, he cut your brake line and just as you leave, you fail to stop at a traffic light and cause a ten car wreck, causing you to become a quadriplegic.

I wished everyone used proper English on the internets.

[kryyst]

I wished everyone used proper English on the internets.

*POOF* l33t sp3k has now become the official english language.

I wish I cared.

[LiLbRo]

Poof! now you care, about everything, thats right, every single persons problem in the entire world... yep, even the emo kids :)

I wish I had a new computer

[karatekid]

So you want a new computer eh? Well here you go, a new laptop that comes packed with everything, including a large, beautiful display and a mouse --> New Laptop (http://www.vtechkids.com/product_page.cfm?productId=454?tvFrom=&productImage=%5Ff%2F%5Fpw%2F%5Fthumb%2F80%2D071300%5Fthumb%2Ejpg&productStatus=n&tvFrom=&productId=454&productType=p&getProp=%5Btype+Function%5D&loadImage=%5Btype+Function%5D&makeComingStripe=%5Btype+Function%5D&makeNewProductSnipe=%5Btype+Function%5D&theType=product).

I wish I wish I hadn't killed that fish.

[Your Amish Daddy]

Pbbbllllltt! The fish lives! Franken-fish! It terrorizes coastal towns until the Coast guard kills it with tartar sauce.

[LiLbRo]

... you have to wish for something!

[Your Amish Daddy]

I did, but I see it didn't work. I wanted a stable 19DB antenna out of the scrap I have in my garage.

[kryyst]

I did, but I see it didn't work. I wanted a stable 19DB antenna out of the scrap I have in my garage.

*POOF* Your wish is my command. You've made a stable 19DB antenna out of the scrap in your garage. The scrap in your garage though is consisting of the wreckage of your car that resulted from the destruction of your garage in a freak lawnmower accident in which 6 squirrels, 2 cats and the paper boy were involved.


I wish I had a really - really comfy pair of shoes.

[LiLbRo]

Poof you now have a REALLY super comfey pair of shoes, but, no feet... too bad

I want a new mouse for my computer

[Your Amish Daddy]

Quack-tastic! You have a new mouse for your computer, but he got inside it and shorted out your video card, and became one with your motherboard during that electricity-induced seizure. And you've only had him for a day. Poor Micky.

I wished I had a solid gold toilet.

[karatekid]

*GLEEN* You have a solid gold toilet sitting at your front door. All you have to do is move the thing to your upstairs bathroom. I sure hope you have been working out, cause that thing is going to way a TON. Plus, you are probably going to have to reinforce the flooring in your bathroom. But still, you get to poo on solid gold, that's pretty pimp.

I wish web hosting companies did their jobs better (aka not crashing all the time, having support available when its needed.)

[kryyst]

I wish web hosting companies did their jobs better (aka not crashing all the time, having support available when its needed.)

*POOF* In a movement to create a more stable platform all hosting companies have now merged with AOL. Stability is increased by 100% by ensuring that no users are allowed to muck it up.

I wish that the next person making a wish get's it twice as bad as me.

[Zuntar]

*Crack* Your wish comes true as i amm slowwly loosingg myyfingfersand iiiiiiiii catn' tpye wthi oiut mii fniegrs aaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh

I wsih foir myt fniegrs bascjk!!!!@@

[LiLbRo]

*Crack* Your wish comes true as i amm slowwly loosingg myyfingfersand iiiiiiiii catn' tpye wthi oiut mii fniegrs aaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh

I wsih foir myt fniegrs bascjk!!!!@@

poof! you get your fingers back, but too bad they are on your feet! darn.

I have no wish.. someone can just wish

[karatekid]

I have no wish.. someone can just wish

Alrighty, I wish for some aspirin.

[Your Amish Daddy]

Shineola! You now have a brand new bottle of Asprin made by Umbrella. Well, I guess your imagination can paint a good enough picture for you. Lucky me, my shotgun came today. *Chi-Clak!*

I wish I was as cool as Frank Castle.

[kryyst]

*SHPLASMA* You are suddenly as cool as http://www.castlefinearts.com/img/frank_and_namiki.jpg the guy on the left. His name is Frank Castle he's the owner of a Fine Art society. He gets laid maybe once a year by his Hetero-Life mate (that's the guy on the right).



I wish I had my own personal ninja.

[LiLbRo]

Poof!
You now have a personal ninja, but he becomes rabid! he then attacks you and you die :(


I wish I had a new saxophone

[Zuntar]

Poof! Your new saxophone shows up on your doorstep, but the fed-ex man falls down the steps on your porch and breaks his ankle. He's out of work, so he can't pay his bills so he yells at his boss and gets fired. He can never work there again so he goes postal and open fires on everybody at the fed-ex plant sparing only 3 people, but the last thing they remember him saying was that he was comming after you!


Ding dong.....Chi-Clak



I wish I had more time to do fun things.

[Your Amish Daddy]

Ring Ring Ring Ring Ring Ring Ring Ring Bananaphone! There is more time for fun things! Six hours have been added to the day. Your boss hears about this, and finds a way to make you work those six hours extra for no pay.

I wished I had a new jacket that had BAD GUY written on the back.

[kryyst]

I wished I had a new jacket that had BAD GUY written on the back.

*BLAMO* You do only it's pink and BAD GUY is written in Glitter.

I wish I hadn't eaten so much at lunch.

[Your Amish Daddy]

Tar.GZ! Since it's been atleast two days since you ate that lunch, you no longer regret it, and regret skipping lunch for two days.

I wished I had a fresh bottle of Goo Gone.

[yagga]

I wished I had a fresh bottle of Goo Gone.

Zing! You noticed a bottle of Goo Gone on the kitchen counter, but when you pick it up you realize it was covered in super glue and your hands are now stuck together. :clap:

I wish hard drives didn't fill up!!! ~"Argghh!"~

[Your Amish Daddy]

IRQL_NOT_LESS_OR_EQUAL! Hard disks now use a version of flatspace technology and they are now limitless in storage, but the fault is that flatspace is unidemensional, your files quickly become public and you get arrested for running a horse porn ring.

Yar har flippity gee, A pirate wished I be!

[kryyst]

Yar har flippity gee, A pirate wished I be!

*Squalamalamalam* Ladies and Gentlemen let me introduce Cabin Boy YAD.


I wish I'd never loose at Poker again.

[Zuntar]

*BAM* that was the last sound you heard after winning three in a row against the huge lunatic with a gun you were just playing.

I wish I'd never get sick again.

[im4??]

*POOF* you are now healthy and will never be sick or age....but the whole human race is wipped out in an epidemic with you being the sole survivor enjoy eternity alone..

I wish I could use my debit card endlessly without ever having to worry about how much money I had.

[kryyst]

*Poof* through some freak accident your bank card transactions get reversed so every debt acts as a credit and vice versa. Essentially meaning that the more you spend the more money goes into your bank account. Unfortunately after 10 years of this the interest you have accrued doing this catches the attention of the IRS and they throw you directly into jail for tax fraud. Say hi to your new cell mate Bubba.


I wish that every day was Saturday.

[im4??]

*Shazam* Using a combination of hexes and bad luck potions The 65 year old genie heard your request and will ensure that each and every day is a sadder day than the previous day.

I wish that vocal off-shoot groups of anything wouldn't get as much political attention.

[Your Amish Daddy]

Hoobastank! Offshoot political activist groups and special interest parties have fallen off the media map, and have been replaced with the corpse of Mr.Rogers singing Gloria Gainer's It's raining men.

I wished I looked as good as Tim Currey in The Rocky Horror Picture Show, so I could wear my Pink Glitter "BAD GUY" shirt with tons of pins and buttons.

[Zuntar]

KaBLAM!! Your wish has been granted.

20 minutes after you go out in public a large group of skinheads spots you and beats the crap out of you leaves you for dead in the outskirts of town where a group of rednecks finds you and continues the fun. The last thing you remember one of them saying was "he sure does have a purty mouth":eek:


I want another Cinnamon Melts from McD's, (that was yum)

[im4??]

"Alah peanut butterand jelly sandwiches" your wish is granted...however the local McD's ran out of the covering cream so all the zitty faced kids teamed up and popped their zits collectively and mixed in a little sugar so the taste might not be the same as the last one.

*I wish I was a very talented wizard and didn't have to rely on other people granting my wish.

[Your Amish Daddy]

Shazaam Hears you! You are now a Genie and can grant any wish! But since you're a genie now, you cannot grant your own wishes and no longer possess free will. Your new master, a greedy, fat, zitty and smelly 19 year old wappanese guy constantly wishes for you to be sailor moon. You can figure out the rest.

I wished the Icrontic Forums were more active in the normal categories, instead of here.