Things changed.

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Snowbunnies and Buddha nature

Posted 6 Apr 2009 at 7:04am by primesuspect

That WAS a black hoodie until I got covered in snow like an asshole

I didn't jog tonight; instead I punished myself by walking an extra 1/2 mile. There are two reasons I didn't jog: the first is that I ate and drank like shit today. I started off with beer and an omelette at the inaugural Icrontic Co-Working event, and ended the night in a bar with a friend from out of town, so yeah, my body was rejecting physical effort. Reason two is that it is SNOWING LIKE ****ING ASSHOLES out there, the ground is icy as shit, and I would have died. I nearly slipped three times just waddling around like the penguin that I am.

Anyways, I started off bitching and moaning about the weather. Of course it's April, of course it was in the upper 60's a week or two ago, and of course, this being Michigan, it's going to snow 6 inches and it's 31 degrees out right now.

I was |-| THIS close to bailing. But I hate myself enough that I wanted to punish myself by going out in this shitstorm. Words will never be able to convey how much I tried to talk myself out of going. If you are fat and hate exercise, you may begin to understand where I'm coming from. I was seething pissed by the time I finally got my hoodie on and walked out the door, cursing.

I stormed out, and the wind and giant wet snowflakes were blowing directly into my face. I pulled my hood tighter, put my head down and started marching.

After a half mile or so, I realized something: This may be the last snowstorm I see for months. The ground was covered in a pristine layer of white. The kind of quiet that only comes when the world is covered in snow descended. This being Asshole O'Clock on a sunday night, there was not a car in sight. My Buddhist teachings kicked in and said "Look around you. It's beautiful. When you are doing this 3 months from now and it's 97 degrees and pouring rain and lightning out, you'll be begging for this." I slowed down, watched snowflakes swirl and dance, and tried to be present in each breath.

I was still in agony; the shitty food and beer I ate today was paying me back. My legs burned and ached with each step, and the only thing that drove me on was the fact that each step brought me closer to home, and out of the cold and wet.

I started having visions of snowbunnies. I always had a soft place in my heart for nordic goddesses and by the time I got done envisioning gorgeous women in furry hats and sexy boots frolicking in the snow, I was almost home.



If that's what it takes to keep my ass moving, so be it.

One last thing:

About a mile in, I stopped and bent down. I wrote two words into the snow on the sidewalk with my finger:

"THINGS CHANGED"

**** yes, they did.
Total Comments 12

Comments

Old
poofie's Avatar
is it weird that i find this inspiring? i admire your ability to get yourself out the door. i have been meaning to start walking/jogging, but i'm not very convincing yet.
Posted 6 Apr 2009 at 11:10am by poofie poofie is offline
Old
Good job sticking with it (I'm fat and hate exercise too)... and nice photo.
Posted 6 Apr 2009 at 2:44pm by BachmnTurnrOverclock BachmnTurnrOverclock is offline
Old
primesuspect's Avatar
I don't think it's weird at all. I was inspired by other people's struggles. My hope is that there are a legion of us out there: fat people who are actually smoking hot underneath all of it, and all we have to do is get rid of the weight and then we'll all have hedonistic orgies, double team each other, run trains on each other, and point and laugh at all the people who are like "man those people are crazy!"

It's gonna be a wild party. You coming?
Posted 6 Apr 2009 at 5:47pm by primesuspect primesuspect is offline
Old
Winfrey's Avatar
^5 prime!

Shitty weather is shitty, but you are right, this should be the last gasp of winter enjoy it if you can!
Posted 6 Apr 2009 at 6:14pm by Winfrey Winfrey is offline
Old
mondi's Avatar
Don't jog. Seriously.

A heavier guy like you is going to wreak havoc on your joints, especially your knees with jogging and running. Walking is more than enough to start with.
Posted 6 Apr 2009 at 7:31pm by mondi mondi is offline
Old
primesuspect's Avatar
It's like a thin person jogging with two bags of fertilizer strapped to their belly.

It's not easy. almost all my fat is in my belly.
Posted 6 Apr 2009 at 7:40pm by primesuspect primesuspect is offline
Old
GnomeWizardd's Avatar
Good shoes!
Posted 6 Apr 2009 at 9:36pm by GnomeWizardd GnomeWizardd is offline
Old
UPSLynx's Avatar
Great post. I was almost certain that you were going to bail out last night. I knew the weather was sucking, and I saw that you had rolled out at around 10pm ish. I know I give myself days off, so I figured you'd be the same.

Glad to see you proved me wrong.
Posted 7 Apr 2009 at 12:26am by UPSLynx UPSLynx is offline
Old
Mochan's Avatar
Like I said Prime. Don't force yourself to jog if you don't want to. Just WALK instead. Jogging doesn't necessarily burn off more fat than walking. Sure, if you jog for an hour and walk for an hour, you'll burn more jogging; but fact is fact you can't jog for an hour but you might be able to walk for an hour -- and an hour's walk will do you more good than a minute of jogging.

And YES fantasize about the women man! I did that a lot when I was exercising about 3 years ago. It really helps motivate. Nothing to be ashamed of, no sir!
Posted 7 Apr 2009 at 12:34am by Mochan Mochan is offline
Old
jokerz4fun's Avatar
brain Im very proud of you for taking that first step for getting back into shape. I know it wont be an easy road to tackle, but your not a quitter either. Hang in there buddy.
Posted 7 Apr 2009 at 3:47am by jokerz4fun jokerz4fun is offline
Old
Annes's Avatar
My hope is that there are a legion of us out there: fat people who are actually smoking hot underneath all of it, and all we have to do is get rid of the weight and then we'll all have hedonistic orgies, double team each other, run trains on each other, and point and laugh at all the people who are like "man those people are crazy!"
Did you call my name?
Posted 7 Apr 2009 at 2:24pm by Annes Annes is offline
Old
chrisWhite's Avatar
Hey man, you're kicking my ass too, I've been doing pretty decent on a diet for a bit now but the exercise, not happening much. So I'm going to get my ass in gear too. Keep it up man!
Posted 7 Apr 2009 at 6:07pm by chrisWhite chrisWhite is offline
 
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