Delete Me

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  • ShortyShorty Manchester, UK Icrontian
    edited November 2004
    shwaip wrote:
    I find the best way to remove the crappy feeling is to go to the bathroom.
    Punching one out works for ya huh mate? ;D
  • shwaipshwaip bluffin' with my muffin Icrontian
    edited November 2004
    I don't argue with my body.
    If I'm hungry, I eat.
    If I'm tired, I nap.
    If I feel the urge, I "test fire the death star".
    and if I feel crappy, I take one.

    ;D
  • primesuspectprimesuspect Beepin n' Boopin Detroit, MI Icrontian
    edited November 2004
    what ever happened to the "sit up instead of bishop-slap" thing, shwaip? :D
  • shwaipshwaip bluffin' with my muffin Icrontian
    edited November 2004
    Someone and I had a bet that I wasn't able to not watch porn the entire summer (last summer), and I just needed to not watch the porn...I could still "unsheath the meatsabre". And that's over now anyways.

    btw, I did go the entire summer w/o the porn.
  • primesuspectprimesuspect Beepin n' Boopin Detroit, MI Icrontian
    edited November 2004
    omg "unsheathe the meatsabre" ;D:thumbsup:
  • profdlpprofdlp The Holy City Of Westlake, Ohio
    edited November 2004
    Clutch wrote:
    ...
    All use of the word winkie in this post has to be credited to Gnome ;)
    I've heard it said that "wee winkie" and "Gnome" are synonymous. :vimp:
  • KwitkoKwitko Sheriff of Banning (Retired) By the thing near the stuff Icrontian
    edited November 2004
    So Prime sez to me, he sez, "Well, there's always an opening for you, whenever you're ready."

    Let me tells ya. I ain't *never* gonnna be ready to fill Prime's opening, if ya knows what I mean."
  • profdlpprofdlp The Holy City Of Westlake, Ohio
    edited November 2004
    Good God in heaven... :eek:
  • edited November 2004
    Damn, you guys brought a smile to my face reading this crazy stuff and I really needed that right now. I'm presently fighting a damn chest cold, coughing my effing lungs up a bit at a time and am feeling like hammered cat****; all the muscles in my chest and midriff hurt from all the coughing. Keep up the good work! :thumbsup:
  • profdlpprofdlp The Holy City Of Westlake, Ohio
    edited November 2004
    Colds suck. Then they blow.

    Then the victim (that's you, mudd) tries to suck (air) and blow (phlegm) - but can't. Then your friends try to be funny and fail miserably. A few days later everything opens up and you feel better. Then you hunt your friends down and beat their assets. My portfolio is cringing even as we speak.

    Some jokes for you:

    ********************

    Three men: Shorty, MediaMan, and muddocktor are helping out on a project. About midweek they decide to walk up and down the beach during their lunch hour. Halfway up the beach, they stumbled upon a lamp. As they rub the lamp a genie appears and says "Normally I would grant you three wishes, but since there are three of you, I will grant you each one wish."

    Shorty went first. "I would like to spend the rest of my life living in a huge house in St. Thomas with no money worries." The genie granted him his wish and sent him on off to St. Thomas.

    muddocktor went next. "I would like to spend the rest of my life living on a huge yacht cruising the Mediterranean with no money worries." The genie granted him his wish and sent him off to the Mediterranean.

    Last, but not least, it was MediaMan's turn. "And what would your wish be?" asked the genie.

    "I want them both back after lunch" replied MediaMan.


    **********************

    primesuspect goes into a bar. He has a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender looks up and says "Hey, that thing's pretty cool. Where'd you get it?"

    The parrot says "Sarcnet! - they got a whole bunch more of 'em over there, too!

    ***********************

    Donut, tcith, and bothered were all given a red rubber ball and told to find the volume.
    Donut carefully measured the diameter and evaluated a triple integral. (10 Minutes)
    tcith filled a beaker with water, put the ball in the water, and measured the total displacement. (5 Minutes)
    bothered looked up the model and serial numbers in his red-rubber-ball table. (15 Seconds)

    ***********************

    Remember, mudd - If it wasn't for Thomas Alva Edison, we'd all be looking at our monitors by the light of a candle.

    ***********************

    CBDroege, mtgoat, and dragonV8 were given the task of finding the height of a church steeple (the first to get the correct solution wins a $1000).

    CBDroege tried to remember things about differential pressures, but resorted to climbing the steeple and lowering a string on a plumb bob until it touched the ground and then climbed down and measured the length of the string.

    mtgoat layed out a reference line, measured the angle to the top of the steeple from both ends and worked out the height by trigonometry.

    However, dragonV8 won the prize. He bought the vicar a beer in the local pub and asked him how high the church steeple was.

    *************************

    How do you keep a programmer like Shorty in the shower all day?
    Give him a bottle of shampoo which says "lather, rinse, repeat."


    *************************

    Feel better soon, buddy! :)
  • botheredbothered Manchester UK
    edited November 2004
    Red rubber ball table. ;D
  • S_WilsonS_Wilson Meridian, ID
    edited November 2004
    WTH, go away for few days and come back and this thread is still in the same forum. Somebodies slacking! :D
  • KwitkoKwitko Sheriff of Banning (Retired) By the thing near the stuff Icrontian
    edited November 2004
    You're right, S_Wilson, it needs to be moved. Since mudd has a cold, we'll move this to the Cooling forum.
  • LINLIN Tri_State Area
    edited November 2004
    Kwitko wrote:
    You're right, S_Wilson, it needs to be moved. Since mudd has a cold, we'll move this to the Cooling forum.
    Cooling forum? sounds good! i was running a little hot as it was ;)


    LIN
  • profdlpprofdlp The Holy City Of Westlake, Ohio
    edited November 2004
    LIN wrote:
    Cooling forum? sounds good! i was running a little hot as it was ;)


    LIN
    After reading your comment I seem to be getting a little warm myself... :cool:
  • ThraxThrax 🐌 Austin, TX Icrontian
    edited November 2004
    How about a little musical flavor?

    <DON'T embed src="http://www.youareanidiot.org/youare.swf&quot; width=640 height=480>
  • LINLIN Tri_State Area
    edited November 2004
    profdlp wrote:
    After reading your comment I seem to be getting a little warm myself... :cool:
    Lol, i think we'd better stop overclocking, prof! ;)


    LIN
  • KwitkoKwitko Sheriff of Banning (Retired) By the thing near the stuff Icrontian
    edited November 2004
    Thrax wrote:
    How about a little musical flavor?

    Really f'in annoying flash removed

    That is really f'in annoying.
  • S_WilsonS_Wilson Meridian, ID
    edited November 2004
    Thrax wrote:
    How about a little musical flavor?

    :wtf: :shakehead
  • ThraxThrax 🐌 Austin, TX Icrontian
    edited November 2004
    Kwitko wrote:
    That is really f'in annoying.

    Good. So is this thread. ;)
  • SquillSquill Chesterfield, Va
    edited November 2004
    This has to be the best waste of webspace I have ever seen. ;D:thumbsup:
  • edcentricedcentric near Milwaukee, Wisconsin Icrontian
    edited November 2004
    I thought that this was silly when there were half a dozen posts.
    I thought that it was wacked when I saw two pages of posts.

    now I come back after a holiday and see 9 freakin pages.
    This is starting to get good.

    By the way, What was Kittie's original question?
  • primesuspectprimesuspect Beepin n' Boopin Detroit, MI Icrontian
    edited November 2004
    I believe it was "delete me"....
  • KwitkoKwitko Sheriff of Banning (Retired) By the thing near the stuff Icrontian
    edited November 2004
    Thrax wrote:
    Good. So is this thread. ;)

    Yet you felt compelled to reply to it 8 times, Thraxypoo.
  • SquillSquill Chesterfield, Va
    edited November 2004
    My pinky finger is numb
    and my toe nail hurts.
  • JustinJustin Atlanta
    edited November 2004
    VIVA LA RANDOMNESS TO CURE MUDD!!!!

    So, I'm dropping random things in the blender yesterday, when it occurs to me that a blender when properly modded could make an awesome projectile hurrler. Hamsters Away!!!!!
  • edited November 2004
    Now I'm coughing up large amounts of this yellowish crap and my upper abdomen feels like I've been working out with weights way too much; all the damn chest muscles are sore as hell. :eek: At least my coughs are now not so dry and I'm actually getting some of this **** out of my chest today though; I'm breathing much easier and not wheezing near as badly. Hopefully I will be on the mend before I have to go back out to the rig so I don't have to take off any days at work and then mess up my schedule around Christmas time.
  • profdlpprofdlp The Holy City Of Westlake, Ohio
    edited November 2004
    My candle burns at both ends
    It will not last the night
    But, ah, my foes, and, oh, my friends - it gives a lovely light.

    Edna Saint Vincent Millay

    I got more if you want them... :D
  • Geeky1Geeky1 University of the Pacific (Stockton, CA, USA)
    edited November 2004
    Why the hell did this get put on my desk?
  • Access_DeniedAccess_Denied tennessee
    edited November 2004
    ay i got an idea... lets see how big we can get this thread.. everybody hore away at it an see if we can break 200 pages :p
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