I think it's time to get some rifles, an airship, some cowboy hats and trenchcoats, and a pet squirrel, and become helium prospectors.
We'll fend off helium pirates, we'll have air combat with rival prospectors, and we'll discover an underground city of helium-exhaling gelatinous beings whom we have shared the earth with for hundreds of thousands of years.
It'll be ****ing rad.
They're not AIR PIRATES. They're HELIUM PIRATES. They come from below with their HELIUM BALLOONSHIPS and drill into your storage tanks. Then they siphon the helium using hand-pumped bellows into their shoddy tanks quickly, leaving you in a lurch. The problems are twofold: You lost your treasurelode, AND you lose the buoyancy boost that comes from the added helium. Return trips are always FASTER because of the helium, you see.
So, lightened with their new load of fresh helium, they jet off faster than you - it's a constant battle!
underground city of helium-exhaling gelatinous beings whom we have shared the earth
CB Droege wrote:
I move to have tt's post stricken from the record.
WHO'S WITH ME?!?!? We'll have ADVENTURES.
We'll have to deal with shady NASA reps, and they won't like dealing with gruff and bearded prospectors like us. We'll have dirty clothes and unkempt hair and our flying squirrels on our shoulders. We'll look very out of place in the shiny white halls of laboratories, and our dirty hoses will connect our ships to their tanks as we accept payment in nothing other than gold bullion.