Icrontic Advice: Talking to my mom #2; Explaining the world of gaming
aspieRommel
Icrontic politicoIndianapolis, IN Icrontian
Hey guys,
I know I started a thread before about how to go about telling her what I want to do with my life. Well, due to some recent events, I am having trouble figuring out how to explain different aspects of the world of gaming.
Here's what I mean.
The other day I was watching a streamer I follow (not subscribed to them yet) on Twitch. They are one of the streamers who does the green screen/facecam thing on their stream. Well, my mom walks by and the following conversation ensues:
Mom: "Who's that guy in the corner (of the screen?"
Me: "A streamer I watch a lot of."
Mom: "He can't see you, can he?"
Me: "No, mom."
Now, I understand that I might have some trouble explaining things to her, especially when I get into topics such as ways to earn money playing video games, competitions (like the ones @FreshyP participates in), and the like. Which is why I wanted to come to you guys, again, and ask if you guys have any idea on how to have that discussion with her. I would really appreciate it.
aspieRommel
Comments
Just explain that it is beginning to become a sport, I mean there was a time when football was just a game, now people make millions throwing a fucking ball.
"Hey Mom... Do you remember John Madden? Or Harry Caray? How they talked about sports and offered commentary on the game? That's what that guy is doing. Except he's not just commenting on a game; he's also playing it at the same time. I like to watch him play games and his commentary is pretty fun too. Did you know he makes money doing this? It's actually his job to play games and talk about it. People subscribe to his show like you'd pay for PayPerView or having cable. And advertisers pay him for sponsorship too. It's pretty nifty. Golly gee I think when I grow up I want to have that job. Good talk mom. Thanks. I love you."
Done.
My approach would be very different: Invite your mom to Icrontic and to this thread. Let the magic happen.
Mom on mic
MOM ON THREAD
I don't think inviting my mom to Icrontic would be a good idea. @petesmom would have fun. Mine, not so much.
If you want to explain in depth how aspects of gaming work the first thing is that your mom has to want to understand. If she has that then it's great, you just have to have patience and walk her through things as they come up. Don't let yourself get annoyed when she asks questions you might think are silly; that's her showing an interest and willingness to learn. However, I've worn myself out trying to explain to people why video games are such a big part of my life because they're stuck in an "it's a big waste of time"/"something kids do" mentality. Those people don't really want to learn and so explaining the details won't help.
With my Mom (who was never a gamer until Candy Crush and Neko Atsume), I think just seeing how happy and animated I got talking about it was probably enough. She doesn't need to fully understand to get that it makes me happy and know that's what matters. Another thing is seeing the community, and the difference that being a part of it makes in your life. Crossing the threshold of meeting people I only previously knew online was huge at the time. Now I show my family photos of Icrontic just like any other vacation I go on. Telling stories and sharing memories make that aspect of your life more real and brings it into a realm she can directly relate to (it also doesn't hurt when she can see other functioning adult people enjoying the same hobbies too).
On a day by day basis, the tack I always try with people is finding the similarities between my hobbies and theirs or at least others with which they may be familiar. You want to turn gaming and streaming into a career, which compares most easily to writing or other arts in my mind. Competitions compare to sporting events, blogging/vlogging to journalism, or other types of writing. You're trying to create content which others will watch, it's entertainment, that's all she really needs to understand.
I was going to respond on your other thread but never found time (been sitting on a post I've been wanting to do for weeks too haha). You need to be careful to manage your expectations with art as a career. It ought to be a hobby first and always. Making money could be a perk one day, but making it your only life goal is a recipe for misery. I've watched a lot of friends walk this path and end up depressed and lost within a few years, and not because they're bad at what they do by any stretch. When you put all that effort into something and don't get out of it what you expected, it feels like a loss. It doesn't have to be; if your only goal is having fun, it's a win every time! Also as your self confidence and satsifaction with your content/feedback decreases so does the quality of your work which makes it a self-deprecating cycle. So instead of struggling to make ends meet while you try to monetize your hobby, just do it because you love it and it makes you happy and make a plan for getting yourself the income to support it.
Understanding this and having a plan which sets small, achievable goals for yourself will satisfy your Mom, but it will also satisfy yourself. Achieving goals, however small, is a big morale booster. It's part of why streaming appeals to you, most likely. When your goal is "shoot a video" and you achieve that, it feels satisfying and that will be the case regardless of whether or not you get paid for it. There's enough pressure to make content which people will enjoy and enough reward when they do, without bringing a need for income into the equation. Work, on the other hand, is always going to be work no matter how much you enjoy it. I love my job, doesn't mean I always feel like doing it. Rare is the occasion when I wouldn't rather be home playing video games and hanging out with my cat.
I'm also an adult-in-progress, still learning as I go. But in my current opinion, it's better to accept your shitty job for what it is and learn how to be happy despite it while you take steps toward setting yourself up with something more meaningful in the future, rather than hanging all your hope on, and dedicating all your time and energy to, something which is only potential future happiness. Learning how to be happy with a crappy job will improve your quality of life now, and also later when you move on to something better because "better job" will no longer be a necessity for you to be happy.
Anyway you want to know how to explain this to your Mom, well streaming is an art and it's a form of entertainment. You want to produce content that others will watch. It's just like going into TV or radio except you don't need a huge bankroll to get started. When it comes to explaining the work side of things, it's likely to be more "show" than "tell" on your part. Show her the content you've created, explain how it holds up against what is currently out there and popular. A big part may be to treat it more professionally. If you're set on the "streaming as a career" path, having a professional appearance and treating it like a job will earn you a lot of respect from your mom and your viewers too. For example, your home office should be an office, not the place where you also play games, watch netflix and let dirty dishes pile up. This also helps you to set your mindset based on your environment to encourage productivity when you need it.
If she can see things like this, your mom will know you're working hard and taking it seriously, which is probably what she wants. You should also talk to her about your goals within it; what sorts of techniques are your favourite streamers using that you'd like to adopt? What tools are you using to learn and further your abilities and your knowledge of the field? A portfolio is a good thing to have regardless but it particularly gives you something tangible you can show her to prove you're not doing nothing. Maybe if she's interested you could even show her what goes into recording and editing your videos. Maybe you can convince her to do a "Mom plays X for the first time" video! But at minimum, you should try keeping her up to date on your progress; share with her the things that you learn each week which excite and interest you. Show her the content you are uploading, even if it's just a minute or two. Don't expect her to want to watch it all, obviously, but parents just like to see what their kids are up to even if they can only vaguely wrap their heads around it. The bigger thing is showing her that you have forward momentum and that you are happy. This helps you to track your own momentum also! It's always useful for you to gauge how much progress you are making. Your own sense of forward momentum is key to feeling good about the way your life is going, it's why goals are so important. Don't lose touch with it :-)
It's ironic that you would say that because (I would say this on the other thread) when I get a computer and internet that can handle it, I want to get into iRacing and maybe try to go for the NASCAR iRacing Peak Antifreeze Series, which grants $10,000 to the champion as well as official recognition as a NASCAR champion.