[BLOG] Dear Body
GnomeQueen
The Lulz QueenMountain Dew Mouth Icrontian
I think I've been pretty nice to you lately. I mean, I'm eating much healthier, and we're working out now. It's true that occasionally I do fall over on you, or give you beer, or silly things like that, but overall, I feel like I've been pretty good to you lately.
So I'm wondering if, in return, you could stop attacking every little bit of pollen that comes across our path as though it's a gladiator coming at us with a spear, machine gun, and armored tank? I promise you that the pollen isn't secretly going to turn into a zombie army, nor are there decepticons hiding in it. So, let's stop producing tons of histamines every time a little ragweed plant pumps out some pollen, and direct our energy to more productive places, shall we? How about we attack the devious little fat cells we've got instead. Sound good?
Lovingly yours (literally!),
Jackie
P.S. Oh, and if you could possibly stop growing leg hair entirely and send our boobs up a cup size that would also be pretty great.
So I'm wondering if, in return, you could stop attacking every little bit of pollen that comes across our path as though it's a gladiator coming at us with a spear, machine gun, and armored tank? I promise you that the pollen isn't secretly going to turn into a zombie army, nor are there decepticons hiding in it. So, let's stop producing tons of histamines every time a little ragweed plant pumps out some pollen, and direct our energy to more productive places, shall we? How about we attack the devious little fat cells we've got instead. Sound good?
Lovingly yours (literally!),
Jackie
P.S. Oh, and if you could possibly stop growing leg hair entirely and send our boobs up a cup size that would also be pretty great.
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