How to grieve in an online world

primesuspectprimesuspect Beepin n' BoopinDetroit, MI Icrontian
edited October 2012 in Lifestyle


  • HumerusMegHumerusMeg Something, something medical professional, Fitness bitch, Sexy chef Austin Icrontian
    Beautifully said Brian. Since Thursday night when Brian called me, I have struggled with the words to say, the feelings to feel, the emotions to express. Here was a man that I have known and loved since I was 7 years old, and spent a great deal of time dating. Even as I sit here today I haven't yet found the way to express my feelings. But I do know this, no way would I have gotten through the last few days without our amazing Icrontic family, and to all of you for your hugs, love, support, and just plain outstanding caring from the bottom of my heart, I thank you, I love you, and I don't know where I would be without you. As they say, the journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. Let us hold one another's hands and walk this together, because as a group we are as strong as they come.

    Love you all <333
  • RahnalH102Harlan Webb the Green Devout, Veteran Monster Hunter, Creature Enthusiast New Mexico Icrontian
    edited October 2012
    I experienced this back in April. Got up one Sunday morning, checked Facebook, and then I felt same disbelief that I felt when I read what happened to Spencer. I never got to physically meet her but over two years of talking and playing together we became good friends. We would play together regularly as well as with the rest of our online friends. We had our own little community. Good times.

    The "if"s, I had so much of those too and I still confront them. If I had taken some simple actions purely by happenstance, she could still be here, have gotten married to her fiance and I may have gotten to actually meet her and the rest of them if I had gone to Expo (lived in Michigan.)

    What hurts me the most still, is that the day before she died, she asked me if I wanted to play a few matches together, and I declined because I "wasn't in the mood." I don't think I'll ever forgive myself for that.

    Overall, I've had 3 big reminders this year that life can get real crazy and change drastically or completely in an instant. I hope to never again have that many in one year.

    I learned to accept the inevitable end that we'll all face a long time ago, and my job reminds me of it weekly if not daily. So I trudge forward, making memories that matter, with friends that matter. Thank you Icrontic.

    Be safe all, and have fun!
  • RyderRyder Kalamazoo, Mi Icrontian
    Very well written Brian. Happy to have all you guys around for this horrible situation, thankful for each and every one of you. I was very happy that I got to see everyone who attended Oktoberfest, I will have to see the rest of you at later events.

    Thanks again.
  • ThraxThrax 🐌 Austin, TX Icrontian
    Good. Now come to Icrontic's New Year's Eve party.

  • TeramonaTeramona Consulting Tea Specialist Best Coast! Icrontian
    Thrax said:

    Good. Now come to Icrontic's New Year's Eve party.


  • ketoketo Occupied. Or is it preoccupied? Icrontian
    That was an epic write, Brian.
  • Straight_ManStraight_Man Geeky, in my own way Naples, FL Icrontian
    Excellent article Brian.
  • JBoogalooJBoogaloo This too shall pass... Alexandria, VA Icrontian
    Beautifully written Brian.
  • pseudonympseudonym Michigan Icrontian
    Thrax said:

    Good. Now come to Icrontic's New Year's Eve party.


  • BandrikBandrik Elkhart, IN Icrontian
    edited October 2012
    Absolutely beautiful. Man-tears were shed.

    Brian, you put into words many things that I too was thinking, yet could not bear to say aloud. Similar to how you felt about your sons, I too thought of people I was close to. As much as I'll miss Spencer, I'm left thinking about others I would miss even more... while simultaneously feeling terrible and selfish for favoring someone's death for another's survival. No matter how I look at it, it will never come out fair.

    We all have irreplaceable people in our lives. Ones that we are closest to. And to many people here, Spencer was one of those people.
  • CrazyJoeCrazyJoe Winter Springs, FL Icrontian
    edited November 2012
    LilSis said:

    This is Anna, Spencer's sister. I can't thank you enough for everything you've done for me, my family, and especially for Spencer! Thank you. I am now becoming a part of Icrontic... and now you're stuck with me ^_^

    Anyone who lists their primary employment on Facebook as president of a Steampunk group is already well on their way to fitting in around here. Welcome aboard and deeply sorry that it had to occur under these circumstances.
  • QCHQCH Ancient Guru Chicago Area - USA Icrontian
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