Winfrey's Woebegone Wishlist of Whoa

Winfrey

AaAaAA!!! - A Reckless Disregard for Gravity
Adventures of Shuggy
Age of Empires 3: Complete Collection
AI War: Fleet Command
Alan Wakes American Nightmare
Alice: Madness Returns
Alien Breed 2: Assault
Alien Swarm
Alien Zombie Megadeath
All Zombies Must Die
Alpha Protocol
Altitude
Amnesia: The Dark Descent
Analogue: A Hate Story
Ancients of Ooga
And Yet It Moves
Anomaly: Warzone Earth
Aquaria
Assassins Creed 2
Assassins Creed
Assassins Creed: Brotherhood
Astro Tripper
Atom Zombie Smasher
AudioSurf
Avernum 4
Avernum 5
Avernum 6
Bastion
Batman: Arkham Asylum GOTY Edition
Batman: Arkham City
Beat Hazard
Ben There, Dan That!
Beyond Good and Evil
BioShock 2
BioShock
BIT.TRIP BEAT
BIT.TRIP RUNNER
Blocks That Matter
Bob Came in Pieces
Borderlands 2
Borderlands
Braid
Breath of Death 7
Brink
Brothers in Arms: Earned in Blood
Brothers in Arms: Hells Highway
Brothers in Arms: Road to Hill 30
Bullet Candy
Bulletstorm
Burnout Paradise: Ultimate Box
Call of Juarez: Bound in Blood
Castle Crashers
Cave Story+
Children of the Nile
Chime
Chivalry: Medieval Warfare
Cloning Clyde
Closure
Cogs
Colour Bind
Commandos 2: Men of Courage
Commandos 3: Destination Berlin
Commandos: Behind Enemy Lines
Commandos: Beyond the Call of Duty
Company of Heroes
Company of Heroes: Opposing Fronts
Company of Heroes: Tales of Valor
Costume Quest
Counter-Strike
Counter-Strike: Condition Zero Deleted Scenes
Counter-Strike: Condition Zero
Counter-Strike: Global Offensive
Counter-Strike: Source
Crayon Physics Deluxe
Crysis Warhead
Crysis Wars
Crysis
Cthulhu Saves the World
Cubemen
Dangerous High School Girls in Trouble!
Dark Messiah Might and Magic Single Player
Darkest Hour: Europe 44-45
Darksiders 2
Darksiders
Darkstar One
Darwinia
Day of Defeat
Dead Island
Dead Space 2
Dead Space
Deathmatch Classic
DEFCON
Defenders Quest: Valley of the Forgotten
Defense Grid: The Awakening
Demolition Inc.
Depths of Peril
Deus Ex: Game of the Year Edition
Deus Ex: Human Revolution
Deus Ex: Invisible War
DiRT
DiRT 2
Divinity 2 - The Dragon Knight Saga
Divinity 2: Developers Cut
DogFighter
DOOM 2: Hell on Earth
DOOM 3
DOOM 3: Resurrection of Evil
Dota 2
Dragon Age: Origins - Ultimate Edition
Droplitz
Dungeon Defenders
Dungeon Siege 2
Dungeon Siege 3
Dungeon Siege
Dungeons of Dredmor
Dwarfs!
Eets
Elven Legacy
Empire: Total War
Eufloria
F.E.A.R. 2: Project Origin
F.E.A.R. 3
F.E.A.R.: Extraction Point
F.E.A.R.: Perseus Mandate
F.E.A.R
Fable - The Lost Chapters
Fable 3
Fallout 3: Game of the Year Edition
Fallout: New Vegas
Far Cry 2
Final DOOM
FlatOut 2
Flatout 3
Flatout
FlatOut: Ultimate Carnage
Flight Control HD
Flotilla
Fractal: Make Blooms Not War
Freedom Force vs The 3rd Reich
Freedom Force
From Dust
Frozen Synapse
FUEL
Galactic Civilizations 2: Ultimate Edition
Galcon Fusion
Garrys Mod
Gemini Rue
Geneforge 1
Geneforge 2
Geneforge 3
Geneforge 4
Geneforge 5
Geometry Wars: Retro Evolved
Ghost Master
Gish
Grand Theft Auto 2
Grand Theft Auto 3
Grand Theft Auto 4
Grand Theft Auto
Grand Theft Auto: Episodes from Liberty City
Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
Grand Theft Auto: Vice City
Gratuitous Space Battles
Gravitron 2
GRID
Gridrunner Revolution
GundeadliGne
Gundemonium Recollection
Hack, Slash, Loot
Half-Life 2
Half-Life 2: Deathmatch
Half-Life 2: Episode One
Half-Life 2: Episode Two
Half-Life 2: Lost Coast
Half-Life Deathmatch: Source
Half-Life
Half-Life: Blue Shift
Half-Life: Opposing Force
Half-Life: Source
Hammerfight
Harvest: Massive Encounter
Hearts of Iron 3
Hector: Ep 1
Hector: Ep 2
Hector: Ep 3
Hero Academy
Heroes of Might and Magic 5
Heroes of Might and Magic 5: Hammers of Fate
Heroes of Might and Magic 5: Tribes of the East
Hitman 2: Silent Assassin
Hitman: Blood Money
Hitman: Codename 47
Hitogata Happa
HOARD
Home
I-Fluid
Indiana Jones and the Fate of Atlantis
Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
Indigo Prophecy
Jade Empire: Special Edition
Jagged Alliance 2 Gold: Unfinished Business
Jagged Alliance 2: Gold Pack
Jagged Alliance: Back in Action
Jamestown
Just Cause 2
Killing Floor
King Arthur - The Role-playing Wargame
Kings Bounty Armored Princess
Kings Bounty: Crossworlds
Kings Bounty: The Legend
L.A. Noire
Lara Croft And The Guardian Of Light
Lead and Gold: Gangs of the Wild West
Left 4 Dead 2
Left 4 Dead
Legend of Grimrock
LIMBO
LOOM
Lume
MacGuffins Curse
Machinarium
Madballs in Babo:Invasion
Mafia
Magicka
Majesty 2 Collection
Majesty Gold HD
Major League Baseball 2K9
Mare Nostrum
Mass Effect 2
Mass Effect
Master Levels for Doom 2
Max and the Magic Marker
Max Payne 2: The Fall of Max Payne
Max Payne
Medieval 2: Total War Kingdoms
Medieval 2: Total War
Men of War
Mirrors Edge
MLB 2K10
Monday Night Combat
Monkey Island 2: Special Edition
Mount and Blade
Mount and Blade: Warband
Mount and Blade: With Fire and Sword
Multiwinia
Mutant Storm: Reloaded
Napoleon: Total War
Neverwinter Nights 2: Platinum
NightSky
Nuclear Dawn
Oddworld: Abes Exoddus
Oddworld: Abes Oddysee
Offspring Fling!
On the RainSlick Precipice of Darkness, Episode One
On the RainSlick Precipice of Darkness, Episode Two
On the Rain-Slick Precipice of Darkness 3
Operation Flashpoint: Dragon Rising
Orcs Must Die! 2
Orcs Must Die!
Osmos
Overlord 2
Overlord
Overlord: Raising Hell

PirateNinja

I'm scared that your list ends at the letter O. I'm scared that there is even more.

Winfrey

Painkiller Black Edition
Painkiller Resurrection
Painkiller: Overdose
Painkiller: Recurring Evil
Painkiller: Redemption
Patrician 3
PAYDAY The Heist
Peggle Deluxe
Peggle Extreme
Peggle Nights
Pineapple Smash Crew
Plants vs. Zombies GOTY Edition
Portal 2
Portal
Prince of Persia
Prince of Persia: The Forgotten Sands
Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time
Prince of Persia: The Two Thrones
Prince of Persia: Warrior Within
Psychonauts
Puzzle Agent 2
Puzzle Agent
Puzzle Bots
Railroad Tycoon 2 Platinum
Railroad Tycoon 3
Really Big Sky
Recettear: An Item Shops Tale
Red Orchestra 2: Heroes of Stalingrad
Red Orchestra: Ostfront 41-45
Resident Evil 5
Retro City Rampage
Return to Castle Wolfenstein
Revenge of the Titans
Ricochet
Rock of Ages
Rome: Total War - Alexander
Rome: Total War
Runespell: Overture
RUSH
S.T.A.L.K.E.R. Call of Pripyat
S.T.A.L.K.E.R. Clear Sky
S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl
Saints Row 2
Saints Row: The Third
Sam and Max 301: The Penal Zone
Sam and Max 302: The Tomb of Sammun-Mak
Sam and Max 303: They Stole Maxs Brain!
Sam and Max 304: Beyond the Alley of the Dolls
Sam and Max 305: The City that Dares not Sleep
Sanctum
SEGA Genesis and Mega Drive Classics
Sequence
Serious Sam Classic: First Encounter
Serious Sam Classic: Second Encounter
Serious Sam Double 500
Serious Sam: The Random Encounter
Shadowgrounds Survivor
Shadowgrounds
Shank 2
Shank
Shatter
Shattered Horizon
Sid Meiers Civilization 3 Complete
Sid Meiers Civilization 4
Sid Meiers Civilization 4: Beyond the Sword
Sid Meiers Civilization 4: Colonization
Sid Meiers Civilization 4: Warlords
Sid Meiers Civilization 5
Sid Meiers Railroads!
Snapshot
SOL: Exodus
Solar 2
Space Giraffe
SpaceChem
Spec Ops: The Line
Spellforce - Platinum Edition
Spellforce 2: Gold Edition
Spirits
Star Wars Jedi Knight 2: Jedi Outcast
Star Wars Jedi Knight: Dark Forces 2
Star Wars Jedi Knight: Jedi Academy
Star Wars Jedi Knight: Mysteries of the Sith
Star Wars: Dark Forces
Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic
STAR WARS: Knights of the Old Republic 2
Steel Storm: Burning Retribution
Super Laser Racer
Super Meat Boy
Super Street Fighter 4: Arcade Edition
Swords and Soldiers HD
Syberia 2
Syberia
Tales of Monkey Island: Chapter 1 - Launch of the Screaming Narwhal
Tales of Monkey Island: Chapter 2 - The Siege of Spinner Cay
Tales of Monkey Island: Chapter 3 - Lair of the Leviathan
Tales of Monkey Island: Chapter 4 - The Trial and Execution of Guybrush Threepwood
Tales of Monkey Island: Chapter 5 - Rise of the Pirate God
Team Fortress 2
Team Fortress Classic
Terraria
The Binding of Isaac
The Darkness 2
The Dig
The Dream Machine
The Elder Scrolls 3: Morrowind
The Elder Scrolls 4: Oblivion
The Great Art Race
The Misadventures of P.B. Winterbottom
The Secret of Monkey Island: Special Edition
Thief 2
Thief Gold
Thief: Deadly Shadows
Time Gentlemen, Please!
Titan Quest Immortal Throne
Titan Quest
Tobes Vertical Adventure
Toki Tori
Tom Clancys Ghost Recon
Tom Clancys H.A.W.X.
Tom Clancys Rainbow Six Vegas 2
Tom Clancys Splinter Cell Chaos Theory
Tom Clancys Splinter Cell Double Agent
Tom Clancys Splinter Cell
Tomb Raider: Anniversary
Tomb Raider: Legend
Tomb Raider: Underworld
Torchlight 2
Torchlight
Total War: Shogun 2
Trauma
Trials 2: Second Edition
Trine 2
Trine
Tropico 3 - Steam Special Edition
Tropico 3: Absolute Power
Ultimate Doom
Unreal Tournament 2004
Unstoppable Gorg
Uplink
Vampire: The Masquerade - Bloodlines
VVVVVV
Warhammer 40,000 Dawn of War 2
Warhammer 40,000: Dawn of War - Game of the Year Edition
Warhammer 40,000: Dawn of War 2 Chaos Rising
Warhammer 40000: Dawn of War 2: Retribution
Warhammer 40000: Space Marine
Waves
Wizorb
Wolfenstein 3D
X-COM: Apocalypse
X-COM: Enforcer
X-COM: Interceptor
X-COM: Terror from the Deep
X-COM: UFO Defense
Zeno Clash
Zombie Shooter 2

Winfrey

My list is somewhat deceptive to what my steam account shows because a number of these games were games I purchased after beating the pirated copy OR I beat them in steam offline mode.

Overall not that bad, I wanted to play these games anyway, more or less

We start with Adventures of Shuggy.

primesuspect

Oh lawd.

Winfrey

Beat Shuggy.

As far as I can tell you play as batman, but you don't fight crime, you instead have to traverse all of these ridiculous obstacles and jump around and stuff. Once you collect all the green gems you beat the level, which I think is how batman is so rich. Pretty fun game, not as masochistic as Super Meat Boy. It's more of a 1 viking The Lost Vikings.

Next game: AI War: Fleet Command

primesuspect

Good man! Keep it up

Winfrey

AI War: Fleet Command is very newbie unfriendly. I mean holy shit it's complicated and unintuitive. It's like playing a Supreme Commander version of Sins of the Solar Empire. After playing through the brief tutorial I got my ass handed to me repeatedly on the normal difficulty. Now after kicking it down to a mere level 3 AI (it goes from 1-10, 1 being easiest) I've managed to carve a foothold in the galaxy. This game is pretty ridic still. One campaign was ruined because I didn't read a tool tip about hacking an AI Node. Hacking it supposed to weaken the Enemy Homeworld's progress and make it easier to conquer and win the game later. But at the end of the tooltip it says "btw you might want to kill this shit instead of hack it, because as you hack it it spawns an ever increasing number of crazy zombie piloted enemy ships which will eventually overrun all your shit and destroy you" (bolded is mine)

anyways if you can understand even half of what is going on in these screenshots, you will be doing better than me. AND I'VE BEEN PLAYING IT FOR 5 AND HALF HOURS NOW.

Needless to say this game was not marketed to be enjoyed by the masses. It has a ton of depth and strategy, but you have to shovel through so many submenus and extremely tiny tooltip text that it's likely you will never find it. This game is hard.

primesuspect

Man, I am SO glad I didn't end up with that game somehow. I would hate everything forever.

Winfrey

Got my 10 hours of AI War now, if someone could kindly strike though it on my list. This game doesn't have a story or an ending so you pretty much just do your 10 and move on. I was able to get to the AI homeworld and then got into a perpetual stalemate where we both stacked fleets and threw them at each other. Well over 5000 ships were destroyed in several attempts. The end game part of AI War reminded me a lot of Sins of a Solar Empire. But I'd have to say that this game is just less good than Sins in just about every way.

Next is Alan Wake's American Nightmare which should be good. Alice is downloading.

primesuspect

Good thing you don't have the DLC!

Winfrey

Played some Alan Wake, first thing I notice is that it's now with 300% more babe.

Winfrey

Alan Wake's American Nightmare has been beaten. Short but fairly entertaining. I would recommend playing the first Alan Wake for a full experience. The game kind of plays out like Groundhog's Day starring Bill Murray but with guns and scary dudes and finding pages of manuscript. If I had to redo my run it'd be on at least nightmare difficulty. I played through the whole game and never died. And even though I tried to stretch it out by collecting everything and exploring everywhere this game still only lasted about 3 hours of game play.

There is an Arcade mode which is probably worth playing, but not now. It's time for Alice: Madness Returns

primesuspect

Good show! Carrying the torch, Winfrey!

Winfrey

just heads up you have to activate Alice for your Origin account when you first start it. Not a deal breaker for for those who don't have an account already this can be somewhat of a PITA.

The game itself is pretty cool, it's very dark with hinting to child prostitution, abuse and exploitation. Alice is working with a therapist to forget her memory of her entire family being consumed in flames and she ends up in Wonderland once again but Wonderland is definitely not how she last left it.

I've only played through the first chapter so far, but I'd have to agree with most of what others have said, it's well made the jumping puzzles may be frustrating (or not) and the fighting is only hard when there's a bajillion of them.

Winfrey

Oh yeah and the Cat is most certainly back, and he's got an attitude.

primesuspect

Ugh it's so good. I want to play through it again instead of dumbnesia.

Myrmidon

DUMBNESIA TOO STRNK

Winfrey

Beat Alice with a 91% completion at just a little under prime's time (12:34 game time, 14 hours according to raptr).

Pretty great game overall. My only complaints are the lock-on targeting often is way more problematic in large fights than it is useful, and there's parts of the game where it just steals camera control from you for no apparent reason. Sometimes it's to point you towards where you are supposed to go but it's annoying nonetheless. The most similar comparison I can draw for this game is probably Psychonauts. They have a lot of similarities in combat, platforming, and storytelling. I think I like Psychonauts more than Alice, I like it's story and overall style better and just generally had more fun playing it. But Alice is a damn fine game and worth playing by anyone that likes the Alice in Wonderland story (albeit an exceedingly dark version) or that enjoyed Psychonauts.

Next is Alien Breed 2, which I need to download first.

Winfrey

And I forgot to add some screenies.

As you can see I found Raz too

Winfrey

So Alien Breed 2...

I got it for free like a lot of you did (i'm assuming) from that first big Steam Summer Sale event of ridic. It's a remake of an old Atari game by Team 17 where you play the main beefcake of pain. Your ship has jumped out of hyperspace and was immediately collided into by a larger "ghost ship" and with your ship lodged into the ghost ship you are losing orbit and beginning to crash into the nearby planet. Luckily you are beefcake and have gun and can kill all the aliens on the ghost ship so that whatever scheme Officer MIA (yeah that's her name) comes up with to free the ship can be tried. So far it plays like single player Alien Swarm or Shadowgrounds and I'd say both of those games are more fun. Alien breed 2 has you walking around at Deadspace walk speed fighting waves of aliens which lends the game to more of a survival kind of situation rather than run and gun like in Shadowgrounds. I'm nearly halfway done with the story mode as I am on the 3rd mission of 5.

The graphics are decent, the music is ok, and the story is pretty meh. Which kind of describes this whole game. At least I got it for free right?

Winfrey

Finished Alien Breed 2

The game mostly accomplishes it's goals. It's a mostly mindless survival shooter which is pretty good for the stress relief I suppose. Mostly though the repetitiveness of the levels and environment as well as the enemies makes the game really start to drag. I'm glad to be done with this one, there may be some decent replay value here with co-op or hardcore modes, but other games do a much much better job of it.

Next game is Alien Swarm, which is a boss game to play with other people and I don't really want to play it alone, so if anyone wants to play some with me i'll be in irc, or you can skype me, or steam msg. While I wait I might play some of the game after this which is Alien Zombie Megadeath.

Screenies:
One ugly mofo on the monorail

Easily the most annoying part of the game. This turret doesn't stop moving, it continuously rotates depending on which way you aim which gave me a headache and the enemies can't really hurt you so it's like 2 minutes of unnecessary torture.

Protip: if you can risk it, it's best to really save your medpacks. At the start of the next level you get full HP so be a man!

Winfrey

No one's hit me up for some Alien Swarm so for now I've been trying to beat Alien Zombie Megadeath.

This game is an arcadey style platformer where you are a space man and have to clear out these pesky alien zombies with your trusty laser pistol. There's powerups and crystal shards which raise your score multiplier so you can get dem points. The game requires you to do specific things on each level to unlock the medals, which are needed to unlock the later levels in the game. Bonus stages can also be unlocked, but since these are just survival mode get as many points as possible, they aren't necessary to completing the game for this challenge. I'm at just 4 levels away from beating the game, but I have to farm up medals to unlock the last stages which has been somewhat daunting.

Some screenies:

As you can see the game doesn't take itself too seriously, which is a good thing

You will see the you failed screen A LOT

Each level can unlock 4 medals, some of the requirements are a little crazy though.

Winfrey

So the last 3 hours of the 6 total i've put into Alien Zombie Megadeath have all been on the second to last level. It is infuriatingly difficult. At least 70 tries. A lot of this game seems luck based as to where enemies spawn how many, and one of the most annoying mechanic is after you kill an enemy they "pop" knocking other enemies around them in different directions which often leads to them being knocked into as you jump down and leading to your demise. Do not play this game without a gamepad, or else when you rage you might end up shattering your keyboard across your knee in pure unadulterated anger.

yeah here's the level:

Winfrey

Ok I fucking beat this shit. Fuck. This. Game. No more of it ever not even on tuesday fuck it. You know how many tries it took to beat the last level?!? After suffering for 3 hours on level 39 it took exactly ONE TRY. FUCK YOU GAME FUCK YOU FUCK! THIS GAME MADE ME WANT TO FIND A SMILY HAPPY BABY AND ELBOW DROP THE FUKC OUT OF IT!

As an interesting aside I got a funky glitch to happen, while unlocking the final level I managed to make all enemies stop spawning in a bonus stage. I just stood around for 2 minutes and then had to restart the level.

Up next is All Zombies Must Die!, which can't be more infuriating than level 39.

primesuspect

NOW YOU'RE A MAN

Winfrey

I can't get over how lucky that guy in the video got with the boss. He floats to just the right spot for him to kill it quickly. I probably got to the boss part with all three lives at least 7 times and still died. Sometimes after you hit him 3-4 times he just floats his happy ass up to the top right of the screen where you can't hit him and he just throws green balls of shit at you laughing his ass off as you dodge fucking flying bats of assholeishness. Like if you don't get him into that ball form in the first 10 seconds of the fight you lose.

Winfrey

All Zombies Must Die is a surprisingly fun ARPG game where there are 4 survivors of the zombie apocalypse. You start as Jack, The Gamer, and explore the world killing zombies while unlocking new weapons, leveling up and adding the other survivors to your party. There is a ton of funny references from things like the handgun combo's being called Clint shots (referring to dirty harry's lead actor) to collecting cards of the gaming dev's with their wacky nicknames. The game seems like it would be a ton of fun with multiple people so if anyone else has this game feel free to hit me up for some co-op shens.

Screenies:

There's lots of collectible items you can find, but their uses can be dubious at best

To slow down the zombie outbreak there are these sentry walls which can get quite sassy at times

Leveling up requires visiting the restroom in your home base... don't ask

OMG CRAZY MUTAN ZOMOMBIE

Winfrey

I beat All Zombies Must Die!

The last level was kind of insane, not because it was hard but because it was SO FUCKING LOUD HOLY SHIT. Perpetual airstrikes blowing up your ears OP!

Next is Alpha Protocol, should be nice change of pace to these more arcade-like games I've had in a row.

Screenies:

timuchan

Winfrey said:

Next is Alpha Protocol, should be nice change of pace to these more arcade-like games I've had in a row.

Awesome dude! Just finished it. Pistols and stealth. And pistols. And stealth. Or go guns blazing, but I have a feeling the game punishes that behavior much more as the enemies can be fairly ruthless. If you do go nuts, invest in toughness for sure. Martials arts isn't bad to have a couple points in either. Have fun man.

Winfrey

Played a decent amount of Alpha Protocol and it's a pretty cool game. With the voice actor and the movement animations of the main character it makes me feel like I'm playing Mass Effect Espionage 3: This Time Guns. So far the early missions have been pretty easy, I'm playing as a recruit and haven't had any trouble completing missions. I haven't figured out the chatting minigame stuff where you are manipulating characters in the game to like you or hate you. So far i've just been having them like me and I've been getting perk bonuses. The story doesn't seem particularly gripping but the gameplay is pretty good and I haven't found any game breaking bugs or glitches.

One time I was being charged down by a guard after exchanging cursory smg shots. I timed my melee attack to instantly knock him out as he dove in on me. Amusingly he glitched out and just stood stock still even though I had already knocked him out. Then suddenly he just laid down.

screenies:

That guard found out why you don't get jelly donuts.