So, I was playing Skyrim with my new character, a fist fighting Redguard woman clad in Dwarven armor. I had received an anonymous tip that there was an Orcish encampment near to Riften where I believed myself to be able to get myself a nice armor upgrade, so I decided to head out in the bright of day where nothing would be able to get the jump on me.
I saw an undiscovered location on my map, so I decided to make a short detour and check it out. It was a nice little farm by the name of Snow-Shod with a couple of Riften guards just hanging about. I thought to myself 'Well that's nice; I guess I had better get going if I want to get that armor'.
It was then that the flame jet shot out of nowhere, surprising the hell out of me and toasting a few guards. Naturally, I began frantically looking around for the dragon responsible. I didn't actually find the damned thing for about eight seconds before I realized that it was in a grove of trees that had been obscuring it from my vision. As it turned out, the dragon had not actually engaged me in combat (which explains why the battle music wasn't playing) and was actually duelling a bear, of all things.
I tried to retreat for my own safety, but the dragon wasn't interested in letting that happen, and he somehow was waiting for me BEHIND the farm. It then lit me up like a Christmas tree; a burning, screaming Christmas tree. Somehow I managed to escape into the hills with a sliver of heath remaining, desperately using the novice-rank Healing spell as I fled. I then came upon the Shadow Stone, where a Conjurer Adept ended my brief existen- Oh wait; the dragon flattened him, never mind. Well, that was a close call.
OH SHIT, THE DRAGON FLATTENED HIM, THAT'S BAD. OH GOD IT'S EATING ME.
GAME OVER.
Okay then, that didn't go so well; let's try this again.
Get to Snow-Shod Farm, say hello to the guards, dragon attacks (it's an ice dragon this time), kite it into the guards, guards arrow it, it lands, I punch the shit out of it, it dies, get soul, happy happy fun time.
So now that that's over and done with, I decided to head over to the Shadow Stone and kill that Conjurer Adept. What do you mean, he has a Staff of Summon Flame Atronach? Well, that's fine, I'll just play footsies with him around a rock while I heal from catching one too many fireballs to the face and punch him out at intervals while simultaneously avoiding his Flame Atronach. Y'know, no big deal. Okay, lets loot him and take his staff.
Hey, is that a Word Wall on that mountain? Well, that explains where the dragon came from, anyway.
Might as well go and collect that Word of Power while I'm here.
Hey, I don't remember killing a Hagraven on my way up here.
What's that buzzing noise?
OH GOD IT'S A SPRIGGAN, AND I'M LEVEL 13. OH GOD IT'S CHASING ME UP THE MOUNTAIN. OH GOD, THE BEES. THEY STING. OKAY I'M AT THE WORD WALL.
WHY IS THERE STILL A DRAGON HERE?!
ABORT! ABORT!
So, I'm running for dear life from an angry dragon and a Spriggan down the mountain, when I spot some Imperial soldiers on the road below. They begin to fight the dragon and I steel myself for an epic, but winnable, battle.
And then a bear comes out of the brush and kills me.
GAME OVER.
Okay, that didn't go as planned. It's a good thing that I saved after I killed that Conjurer Adept. So, I'm heading up the mountain and hoping to high heaven that there’s no Spriggan this time. I pause for a moment at the base of the stairs leading up to the shrine (because I want that Word, dammit). It was then that I heard… the bees.
I am not aggro-ing the dragon while I have a Spriggan on my tail again, so I decide to head down to the road or the farm or something so the guards can help me kill this thing. Not only do I not find any guards, I also pull three frostbite spiders, two wolves (one of which lovingly gave me Rackjoint) and a bear on my way down. At this point I decide that this isn't worth the trouble and just start dashing back to Riften. I pause at the bridge to get my bearings and see if I lost the legion of angry woodland creatures.
I turn around and hear the bear roaring at me from the bushes, so I back up across the bridge and laugh to myself as I see the bear stupidly wading into the lake instead of following me across the bridge. Or, at least, I WAS laughing until I realized that the damned thing swims about as fast as a freaking motorboat. So it zooms across the lake and I am forced to engage in aquatic combat with it (kind of difficult since it's very hard to tell where it is when it's under the water). I manage to kill it and breathe a sigh of relief as I use the Wait command to restore my health.
I then fast travel to the Shadow Stone and cross my fingers in the hopes that the Spriggan is still at the base of the mountain. I get to the Stone and begin making my way towards the Word Wall, noting a Troll fighting something over in the distance. I say to myself 'Oh , it's probably just a Hunter or something' and keep walking. As I walk, I note that the Troll is fighting not one, but TWO Spriggans and a horde of angry Elk. So I run as fast as I can up the mountain in the hopes they haven't noticed me (a hope that is quickly dashed by the four or so Elk that are chipping away at my Health as I make my way up). I run to the Wall, ignoring the dragon, grabbing whatever was in the chest at the top, learning the Word and running for dear life. I jump off of the cliff, my ass being singed by the dragon's flames, causing just enough damage for me to be killed by the fall.
GAME OVER.
Today I learned that, in Skyrim, pugilism is suffering.
I finally have a story I feel worthy of relating. Having killed off Lydia and Faendal early in their careers as my [strike]bitches [/strike] ... [strike]pack mules[/strike] ... faithful sidekicks, I bought the services of one Stendal (I think, I've learned not to get too attached to them). He accompanied me through a few barrows, helped retrieve several mystical objects and braved fighting through the cold and sobering up (of which he constantly reminded me).
Just as we were starting to really gel as a team (i.e. me telling him to wait, going forward and assassinating people a few feet from their friends, then retrieving the goods and picking up my mule), we went into one particularly dark barrow. You see, the Greybeards had told me of a Thu'um that was hidden in this barrow and I had to have it. Gotta catch 'em all, right? Anyways, I made quick work of the Draugur that lurked around, laughing as I roused them from their crypts only to immediately steal their souls for my enchantments. Having made it to the final room, I saw a fiery mass in the distance, in between the Thu'um and me. Sneaking around the room, I can see that it is a Draugur leader, entombed here for who knows how long, but literally flaming mad. Luckily, I have Stendal and a newly acquired staff which allows me to summon a mighty Draemor to fight for me. I summon the draemor and Stendal runs in, while the Draugur takes chunks out of everyone's health with his fireball-lobbing staff.
After summoning two more draemor throughout the fight and many near deaths as I shot arrows from afar and tried my best to dodge the fiery onslaught, I killed this wretched pile of bones and took the Thu'um he was protecting as my own. Satisfied with my victory and Stendal fully alive, we walked outside into the bright sun. I always like to take a look at the effect of my new powers and this one was no exception. I summoned forth the power of my dragonborn nature and called the storm; lo, a rain began and a few sudden spikes of lightning fell from the sky. Behind me, I hear Stendal yell, "Oww, stop that". I look and see him literally crackling. "What is going on?", I think and he is struck again. My storm is attacking my own companion? I begin to sprint away to attempt and get clear of the storm, but a few more blasts strike him and poor, poor Stendal was dead. A sigh and momentary "not again" later, I collect my belongings, drink a strength potion to help me carry the heavy load he had been bearing, and head to Solitude for a little selling and to find the nearest [strike]sucker[/strike] mercenary.
I have finally traded in Lydia for Aranea (the priestess of Azura) for my companion. She is a total badass with her high-level destruction and conjuration. I barely have to do anything anymore, as most enemies are felled by a single massive lightning blast from her. When she has time to summon her flame atronach, watch the fuck out.
I have finally traded in Lydia for Aranea (the priestess of Azura) for my companion. She is a total badass with her high-level destruction and conjuration. I barely have to do anything anymore, as most enemies are felled by a single massive lightning blast from her. When she has time to summon her flame atronach, watch the fuck out.
...In which case I retract my earlier statement...
I have finally traded in Lydia for Aranea (the priestess of Azura) for my companion. She is a total badass with her high-level destruction and conjuration. I barely have to do anything anymore, as most enemies are felled by a single massive lightning blast from her. When she has time to summon her flame atronach, watch the fuck out.
I really liked working with her. I liked it so much I wanted to marry that chick. At least she came to my wedding even though she worships Azura and it was in the temple of Mara. Classy girl.
I have finally traded in Lydia for Aranea (the priestess of Azura) for my companion. She is a total badass with her high-level destruction and conjuration. I barely have to do anything anymore, as most enemies are felled by a single massive lightning blast from her. When she has time to summon her flame atronach, watch the fuck out.
this
she works REALLY well if you're a smashy 2-handed character using sweeps, cause she never gets in the way.. even if she sometimes takes her clothes off for no reason
also,
give her dragon priest staff + Nahkriin + staff of dread zombie = /game
I gave her a Staff of Lightning Wall last night. She is now a one-woman army. I literally don't have to do anything. She kills all who stand before me.
So this is the story of how I found myself involved with two women in Skyrim.
I had heard talks of the College of Winterhold and knew I had to get up there to learn the ways of magic. I spent a day trekking up to the great white North from Falkreath (on foot, took about two hours to get there). I got straight to business, mostly because Winterhold is a wasteland, and enrolled in the school.
I met up with my new class and immediately stated to learn from our master. It was a small class, four people total including myself. We went on an expedition of sorts together to some old ruins. Long story short, I'm awesome and basically kick off this investigation into this incredible magical artifact deal that we discovered. I become famous pretty much overnight in the college.
As I was leaving the college one evening to go sell some junk, I ran into Brelyna Maryon, a young dark elf student from my class. She asked me if it would be OK if I let her practice some spells on me. I said yes, and all of the spells went horribly, horribly wrong. She freaked out on it all and insisted she'd fix it. Basically, I fell in love with her character because she's adorable.
So I kick Lidya to the side and let Brelyna be my new companion. I planned on marrying her eventually, whenever I find that fancy amulet, but in the mean time we quested all over Skyrim beating the crap out of things. She's very useful to have around, and her personality is fantastic.
One day I returned to Whiterun to drop some stuff off at my house. While there, I walked by a young Nord woman trying to become a merchant. I was blown away, she was frigging cute. Something about her caught my eye from a distance, and I found the woman to be alluring. Her name was Ysolda. Kind of an odd name, but with looks like that, no one would care about a name. So I stuck conversation up with her. She needed help finding a mammoth tusk so she could have income to start her business.
So Brelyna and I went off and slayed a mammoth in a very difficult and dangerous fight. Barely made it out alive. I returned to Ysolda and gave her the tusk. She was very excited when I gave her the tusk, and her joyous grin melted my heart. I wanted to marry this girl now. To make matters worse, her small home in Whiterun suddenly became fully functional as if it were my own. I could use her bed and take anything I wanted without consequence.
So here I am, torn between two women. One, a strong and capable fighter who will follow me to the ends of the earth, the other, a beautiful Nord woman with great business sense and an eye on the future.
I'm working on a way to, well, marry both of them. I'll soon test a theory - to marry Ysolda while keeping Brelyna as my companion, thus having them both in my household.
The anticipation was there... but it failed to deliver. 6/10
I married the Riften housecarl, Iona. My companion is Aranea, the High Priestess of Azura. She is insanely overpowered. I am actually thinking about taking Iona as a companion, getting her killed, and then seeing if it allows me to re-marry. I want to marry a hairy old bearded dude for lulz. I'd rather come home to that than Iona and her insincere "Here, I made you a fresh homecooked meal" as she glares at me.
I was hoping for a feature or glitch that allowed you to marry two people at once. "Failed to deliver" was in that sense, not in your narrative. Sorry.
You can't remarry if your significant other dies, from what I've read. Frankly, I'm getting annoyed with Muiri. She's cute and all, but all she does is thank me for that thing I did for her. Woman, I get it. I didn't help you and then marry you so you'd thank me for the rest of your life. We're past it. Just say hi like a normal person.
I did contemplate Ysolda at the start. I went the easy way and just stole her a tusk, though. Also, you can get the amulet you need in Riften from a guy that works at the Temple of Mara.
You have forced me to do this foul thing, Skyrim. By disallowing divorce, you have pushed me to the brink of darkness.
Poor Iona. She's stuck at home, running "our" store (although all I ever do is take money from her. I've never helped her once. I don't even know where it is), while I'm out adventuring, seeing wild things, killing dragons, hanging out in various inns with Aranea, the confident and powerful high priestess of Azura. Once in a while Aranea and I will drop in, grab a homecooked meal, sell some stuff to my wife (Yep, I make her PAY for what I give her), and then jet out again. "Don't wait up for me, dear!" I say as the door slams and I leave for six days with another woman.
I finally decided to release poor Iona from her servitude. I searched far and wide for a way to divorce her. Nope. Not possible. You can murder servants in front of the Jarl and get away with it, but you apparently can't divorce your slave-wife.
Then a dark seed of an idea began to grow. I figured, if Iona "accidentally" out there in the big world, what with dragons and bandit kings and bloodthirsty frost trolls, it's not a safe place...
So I told Aranea to get lost for a while, and I came home to my loving wife.
"Hello, love!" I said, brightly. "I've been thinking. How would you like a vacation? Maybe see the throat of the world? Or the shimmering snowfields of the Pale?"
"Really? M-me?" she said.
"Yeah! It'll be fun! Just you and I! We never did go on a honeymoon and I thought, well... we're married!"
"Oh wow! I'll get my things!"
"No, no.. don't bother. Let's just go!"
So we did. She, wearing nothing but an iron dagger and me decked out like a shadow wraith nightmare of death. We started travelling.
I took her to all kinds of dangerous haunts. Dwemer ruins. Dragon nests. Bandit strongholds. Necromancer enclaves. Any time danger approached, I commanded her to run forth into battle while I sat back and crouched behind a tree. The most cowardly thing you can imagine; waiting for that dragon to bite my wife's head off so I could be free from this loveless matrimony.
The dragon never did. Oh, he turned her into an ice cube with gales of frost breath. The necromancer shoved an ice dagger right through her heart. The bandit chief cleaved her nearly in two with his greatsword. The frost troll ripped her entire front off.
But each time, miraculously, she stood up, shook it off, and somehow regenerated. She managed to KILL A DRAGON WITH A FUCKING DAGGER.
I am stuck with Iona. She cannot die. She is a goddess. Maybe it's time to get to know her.
TLDR: I found out last night your wife cannot die if she's your companion.
TLDR: I found out last night your wife cannot die if she's your companion.
Badass. Think I'll find a wife that can do something useful like shoot lasers out of her eyes and take her on adventures. Aranea is looking pretty good.
TLDR: I found out last night your wife cannot die if she's your companion.
I took Iona out to die without marrying her first, just 'cause I was tired of the repetitive things she kept saying to me while I was home. She 's immortal even when she's not married to you.
If she's immortal, doesn't that make her slightly more badass than Aranea? Maybe she doesn't have much to say because she's bad at small talk, good at killing dragons.
If she's immortal, doesn't that make her slightly more badass than Aranea? Maybe she doesn't have much to say because she's bad at small talk, good at killing dragons.
She's also good at living forever. This is a perfect follower. Now outfit her in Daedric.
I just had an issue with my follower getting stuck in the Temple of Talos in Markarth. Screw that quest so hard!
Pfft! There's two places a woman should be: in front of the stove and in bed, in both cases she better be there to please you. Women adventuring, now I've heard it all...
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Just as we were starting to really gel as a team (i.e. me telling him to wait, going forward and assassinating people a few feet from their friends, then retrieving the goods and picking up my mule), we went into one particularly dark barrow. You see, the Greybeards had told me of a Thu'um that was hidden in this barrow and I had to have it. Gotta catch 'em all, right? Anyways, I made quick work of the Draugur that lurked around, laughing as I roused them from their crypts only to immediately steal their souls for my enchantments. Having made it to the final room, I saw a fiery mass in the distance, in between the Thu'um and me. Sneaking around the room, I can see that it is a Draugur leader, entombed here for who knows how long, but literally flaming mad. Luckily, I have Stendal and a newly acquired staff which allows me to summon a mighty Draemor to fight for me. I summon the draemor and Stendal runs in, while the Draugur takes chunks out of everyone's health with his fireball-lobbing staff.
After summoning two more draemor throughout the fight and many near deaths as I shot arrows from afar and tried my best to dodge the fiery onslaught, I killed this wretched pile of bones and took the Thu'um he was protecting as my own. Satisfied with my victory and Stendal fully alive, we walked outside into the bright sun. I always like to take a look at the effect of my new powers and this one was no exception. I summoned forth the power of my dragonborn nature and called the storm; lo, a rain began and a few sudden spikes of lightning fell from the sky. Behind me, I hear Stendal yell, "Oww, stop that". I look and see him literally crackling. "What is going on?", I think and he is struck again. My storm is attacking my own companion? I begin to sprint away to attempt and get clear of the storm, but a few more blasts strike him and poor, poor Stendal was dead. A sigh and momentary "not again" later, I collect my belongings, drink a strength potion to help me carry the heavy load he had been bearing, and head to Solitude for a little selling and to find the nearest [strike]sucker[/strike] mercenary.
...In which case I retract my earlier statement...
this
she works REALLY well if you're a smashy 2-handed character using sweeps, cause she never gets in the way.. even if she sometimes takes her clothes off for no reason
also,
give her dragon priest staff + Nahkriin + staff of dread zombie = /game
"Huh. I seem to have found myself in an awkward Ménage à trois in Skyrim. Wasn't expecting that one."
So this is the story of how I found myself involved with two women in Skyrim.
I had heard talks of the College of Winterhold and knew I had to get up there to learn the ways of magic. I spent a day trekking up to the great white North from Falkreath (on foot, took about two hours to get there). I got straight to business, mostly because Winterhold is a wasteland, and enrolled in the school.
I met up with my new class and immediately stated to learn from our master. It was a small class, four people total including myself. We went on an expedition of sorts together to some old ruins. Long story short, I'm awesome and basically kick off this investigation into this incredible magical artifact deal that we discovered. I become famous pretty much overnight in the college.
As I was leaving the college one evening to go sell some junk, I ran into Brelyna Maryon, a young dark elf student from my class. She asked me if it would be OK if I let her practice some spells on me. I said yes, and all of the spells went horribly, horribly wrong. She freaked out on it all and insisted she'd fix it. Basically, I fell in love with her character because she's adorable.
So I kick Lidya to the side and let Brelyna be my new companion. I planned on marrying her eventually, whenever I find that fancy amulet, but in the mean time we quested all over Skyrim beating the crap out of things. She's very useful to have around, and her personality is fantastic.
One day I returned to Whiterun to drop some stuff off at my house. While there, I walked by a young Nord woman trying to become a merchant. I was blown away, she was frigging cute. Something about her caught my eye from a distance, and I found the woman to be alluring. Her name was Ysolda. Kind of an odd name, but with looks like that, no one would care about a name. So I stuck conversation up with her. She needed help finding a mammoth tusk so she could have income to start her business.
So Brelyna and I went off and slayed a mammoth in a very difficult and dangerous fight. Barely made it out alive. I returned to Ysolda and gave her the tusk. She was very excited when I gave her the tusk, and her joyous grin melted my heart. I wanted to marry this girl now. To make matters worse, her small home in Whiterun suddenly became fully functional as if it were my own. I could use her bed and take anything I wanted without consequence.
So here I am, torn between two women. One, a strong and capable fighter who will follow me to the ends of the earth, the other, a beautiful Nord woman with great business sense and an eye on the future.
I'm working on a way to, well, marry both of them. I'll soon test a theory - to marry Ysolda while keeping Brelyna as my companion, thus having them both in my household.
mite b cool.
I married the Riften housecarl, Iona. My companion is Aranea, the High Priestess of Azura. She is insanely overpowered. I am actually thinking about taking Iona as a companion, getting her killed, and then seeing if it allows me to re-marry. I want to marry a hairy old bearded dude for lulz. I'd rather come home to that than Iona and her insincere "Here, I made you a fresh homecooked meal" as she glares at me.
I was hoping for a feature or glitch that allowed you to marry two people at once. "Failed to deliver" was in that sense, not in your narrative. Sorry.
I did contemplate Ysolda at the start. I went the easy way and just stole her a tusk, though.
Poor Iona. She's stuck at home, running "our" store (although all I ever do is take money from her. I've never helped her once. I don't even know where it is), while I'm out adventuring, seeing wild things, killing dragons, hanging out in various inns with Aranea, the confident and powerful high priestess of Azura. Once in a while Aranea and I will drop in, grab a homecooked meal, sell some stuff to my wife (Yep, I make her PAY for what I give her), and then jet out again. "Don't wait up for me, dear!" I say as the door slams and I leave for six days with another woman.
I finally decided to release poor Iona from her servitude. I searched far and wide for a way to divorce her. Nope. Not possible. You can murder servants in front of the Jarl and get away with it, but you apparently can't divorce your slave-wife.
Then a dark seed of an idea began to grow. I figured, if Iona "accidentally" out there in the big world, what with dragons and bandit kings and bloodthirsty frost trolls, it's not a safe place...
So I told Aranea to get lost for a while, and I came home to my loving wife.
"Hello, love!" I said, brightly. "I've been thinking. How would you like a vacation? Maybe see the throat of the world? Or the shimmering snowfields of the Pale?"
"Really? M-me?" she said.
"Yeah! It'll be fun! Just you and I! We never did go on a honeymoon and I thought, well... we're married!"
"Oh wow! I'll get my things!"
"No, no.. don't bother. Let's just go!"
So we did. She, wearing nothing but an iron dagger and me decked out like a shadow wraith nightmare of death. We started travelling.
I took her to all kinds of dangerous haunts. Dwemer ruins. Dragon nests. Bandit strongholds. Necromancer enclaves. Any time danger approached, I commanded her to run forth into battle while I sat back and crouched behind a tree. The most cowardly thing you can imagine; waiting for that dragon to bite my wife's head off so I could be free from this loveless matrimony.
The dragon never did. Oh, he turned her into an ice cube with gales of frost breath. The necromancer shoved an ice dagger right through her heart. The bandit chief cleaved her nearly in two with his greatsword. The frost troll ripped her entire front off.
But each time, miraculously, she stood up, shook it off, and somehow regenerated. She managed to KILL A DRAGON WITH A FUCKING DAGGER.
I am stuck with Iona. She cannot die. She is a goddess. Maybe it's time to get to know her.
TLDR: I found out last night your wife cannot die if she's your companion.
Badass. Think I'll find a wife that can do something useful like shoot lasers out of her eyes and take her on adventures. Aranea is looking pretty good.
I took Iona out to die without marrying her first, just 'cause I was tired of the repetitive things she kept saying to me while I was home. She 's immortal even when she's not married to you.
I just had an issue with my follower getting stuck in the Temple of Talos in Markarth. Screw that quest so hard!
People are making me think about finishing the Azura quest for Aranea, though.