The clamor from the peanut gallery turned into a roar as our E3 visit approached. “Booth babes!” they yelled. “Hot chicks!” they shrieked. “Pics or GTFO!” they wailed.
I was tasked by the multitudes of horny Icrontians: Take pictures of hot chicks.
Sure, I can do that. But if I do, then you must know this:
I’m gonna do it my way.
The Nyko Girls. They had hair to match.
I quickly realized how easy it was to find what I was looking for; not only was I surrounded by gorgeous women with amazing footwear, but when I walked up with my camera gear and asked if I could take pictures of their shoes, every single one of them said yes. Not only did they say yes, they practically jumped at the chance. I discovered something extremely important this week: Women are very proud of their shoes. They spend a lot of money on this important piece of their wardrobes, and when someone (especially a man) not only notices, but calls specific attention to them, they are thrilled.
I believe this was the first pair; the ones that inspired this idea
The booth babes of E3 are usually given outfits, but only given general instruction as to their shoes (there are exceptions, such as the Ubisoft babes who were all to wear green Converse All-Stars). “Wear black high heels” or “wear black knee high boots,” for example. In a situation where these women are essentially being paid to be homogenized and objectified, this is their one remaining stanchion of defiance and personal style. Only their hair and their shoes are up to them, and that’s where we find blistering hotness.
The THQ girls—Cork wedges are the Red Faction girl, and patent gladiator sandals are Darksiders.
Don’t get me wrong—booth babes are almost surely chosen for being stellar in most physical attributes, as well as their ability to be friendly with legions of geeky and awkward fans without acting creeped out (and trust me, my friends, there were plenty of guys that were creep-out-worthy in attendance), but there is just something about their choice of footwear that elevates them from mere models into the realm of scathing sexiness.
Snakeskin gladiator sandals
These women stand on their feet all day, and yet they choose style over comfort; they make the sacrifice for the rare few that can truly appreciate the subtleties of what is going on here, and I am here to tell every single one of you gorgeous ladies: it was noble, and it was not lost on me. I appreciate it, from the bottom of my heart, and I am going to share that appreciation with my friends here on Icrontic. We are far more sophisticated than your average trolling fanboy nerd kids on other gaming sites; we are men and women of style and distinction, we know what you’ve done here, and we like it.
Not only wedge heel All Stars, but also a very cute skirt
I didn’t stop at booth babes. There were vendors, PR people, and even the executive VP of Sales and Marketing for Nintendo, all wearing amazingly hot shoes. I will say this: Cammie Dunaway was the only woman at the entire show that I didn’t have the balls to stop to ask if I could photograph her shoes. I happened to be sharing an escalator with her while she was transporting a sandwich up to the Big N’s private enclave, and while I definitely noticed her excellent taste in shoes, I had a feeling she would have probably not been thrilled with the asking, and I am almost certain she would not have agreed to it. C’est la vie.
The red piping was super hot
Regardless, I have no dearth of hot shoe pictures in my E3 collection. I stopped women on the street, women in clubs, women in the booths, and women on the show floor. As long as they had something to do with E3, I asked.
I am proud to say that I had the support of my teammates and friends in this quest. At first they giggled and snickered; once they saw that I was not only serious about it, but passionate, they started to warm up to the idea. By day 4, I had every single one of them on the lookout for me, pointing out potential winners, and even snapping some pics themselves.
Castle Crashers shoes by Jacob Patterson
I also had some support from unlikely sources; I walked up to a pretty girl in front of a club; she had pink heels with black polka dots and I asked if I could photograph them. Her boyfriend Jacob Patterson jumped in and volunteered some very interesting information: He had designed Castle Crashers heels, and would I be interested in seeing those as well? What could be more topical? It was as if the fates decreed that this meeting should occur. He sent me several pictures of the Castle Crashers shoes that he designed.
This is pro
Another surprise arrived in the form of an exotic and beautiful woman named Russia; she was working the Microsoft Windows 7 Gaming demo a few blocks away from the convention center. Someone had mentioned to her that I had been photographing shoes and she perked up immediately. She told me that she had been people watching, and had also been taking note of the shoes people were wearing. That doesn’t really do it justice. Let me rephrase by saying that Russia was taking detailed statistics about distribution, style, color, and sex. Let me tell you: it is very refreshing to meet someone else that checks out people from the bottom to the top. I may have found my dream woman.
Pink + polka dots = win
All in all, E3 was a fantastic place to go shoe watching. The number of stylish women in attendance was pleasantly surprising, and the variety and sexiness of their shoes just goes to show that this is not a hobby just for sloppy, Cheetoh-encrusted basement nerds. This is a growing industry, and that means room for people of all stripes; even hot girls with sexy shoes.
More shoes after the jump.
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